You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!!

   

courtesy of www.tagweed.com

 

 

“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, ...

 ---Matthew 25:31-46 ESV  

 

Last week was a week where you just hope to survive.  Rules are good but not dealbreakers.  Healthy eating probably not going to happen.  Clean house - a nice dream.  Happy home - sounds good on paper.  But those transition weeks are just overwhelming.  I ended my dream nanny job Tuesday and began my new job Thursday with a dr. appointment in between.  And I was worried that
I was going to be without a job for a l-o-o-o-o-o-o-ng period of time - pffft!  Funny how we worry about things that never come to light.  Then we complain about the things that we hoped would happen - at least that seems to be a common pattern of my life. 

Which also meant last week was a new childcare routine.  Oh the things I took for granted in life before being a mom - long showers, hot meals, quiet, and schedules.  Oh the nightmare of scheduling appointments, childcare, even spontaneous moments of fun need to be scheduled or they just don't happen :)  What was new about this childcare routine?  Besides church where I am actually in the building - I was leaving my baby with a care provider not directly related to me:(  For almost the first 22 months of life ( minus NICU and nursery) my son has been supervised by myself, hubby, or grandmas.  Oh how would we have survived without the grandmas I can't imagine!  But we needed to make a few changes with my new work schedule and that meant enlisting the help of a dear friend who is a fabulous mommy and my numero Uno pick if it couldn't be family. 

This meant a new location.  I have been to my friend's house several times, I had my GPS and texted directions and I still got lost.  I'm talking way lost!  I argued with the GPS - I closed out my texted instructions and I clung to bits of my memory to string together a path to their house.  Directions aren't my thing - but with an almost two year old in the car and the minutes ticking closer to my second day of work I had to pull it together and figure out a solution.  I decided to turn around and start from scratch.  And that's when I saw them.  It was one of those sights that you blink your eyes to see if you are so stressed that you are hallucinating.  Nope - definitely real.  I saw a pack of goats.  Not one not two.  But at least 20 goats skipping along merrily in someone's yard.  Not a farm but someone's yard.  And I'm thinking to myself - how lost am I that I am seeing goats? 

Oh it had been a week of highs and lows and just feeling completely overwhelmed.  Last Tuesday I stood there crying in my brother's office as I no longer would be a nanny for my fabulous nieces and nephews.  He is Mr. Sensitive when it comes to me and questions "Why are you crying - you are going to see them again - you're their aunt."  I know, but its different.  I won't hear the daily thoughts.  I won't hear about their crazy dreams at breakfast or why their moods changed or that their favorite color changed three times within a day.  On paper it might sound a bit strange or even the tiniest bit boring - but it is these little conversations that were like precious gems of our time together.  And my bidding them good-bye as they began school I was losing a job of comfort - being aware of the expectations, familiar surroundings and knowing for the most part the kids and their temperaments.  For I knew within two days new job with a clean slate - new environment, different kids, and piecing together what is expected.  It's challenging.  Somewhat taxing. And Extremely Overwhelming. 

There are new routines, new directions, and new expectations to be established and conveyed.  Working forty hour weeks was a new challenge and some of the housekeeping and organization duties went away for the summer.  This omission added to the chaos that led to my wandering of streets and stumbling upon the goats.  So after Friday it was time to establish a better foundation one that is strong and organized - not weak and cluttered from schedules, to household, to care of my family it was time to start.  I chose the pantry - I am going to disclose a picture - it is the START of clearing my pantry and my opportunity to establish order in what began to feel like an overwhelming ocean of chaos. 

You may be thinking "You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!! " But this is truly 3/4 of my pantry!

 

It was time to reclaim my sanity and that meant start organizing my home once again.   You may see duplicate products.  We are running all the time to the grocery store forgetting lists and not knowing was was hidden in the pantry.  I took inventory of our freezer that is packed to full capacity - almost in need of a sign - "Open door at own risk!"  Insane!  Is the pantry all that needed an overhaul? No!  But it was striking a nail and helping me to reclaim my peace of mind with each pound of the hammer.    It took goats for me to see that I was lost but with a little help, a little time, and a little extra concentration I am going to forge my new path.  It's time to say farewell to chaos and reclaim my peace of mind.

 

May your HealthFULL Journey include peace of mind with little clutter to overwhelm you so that you too don't have to utter " You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!! " 'Til we meet again. . .

 

Fully Dressed with a Smile

Two of my biggest blessings to smile about :)

" For the Mighty One has done great things for me ---holy is his name." ---Luke 1:49 NIV

Life is awesome right now! I am floating on Cloud 9 and can't stop SMILING!!!  In the last week I have had three separate compliments on my appearance - that I look good.  And my first thought is I haven't lost weight according to my scale or clothes.  So what's really different?  Then the lightbulb clicked and I realized I smile these days.  Also if I am being completely honest, I swagger (not wiggle and jiggle which is what happens when I lack confidence and forget to dress with a smile :)  I actually have confidence back because I have a goal - a purpose.  I can move full speed ahead because I am aware of my direction.  Can my journey throw me a surprise curve? Absolutely!  But at least having a goal leads to a path with a true direction instead of wandering aimlessly in circles throwing up my hands and shrugging - I don't know where I'm going or which direction to go.  Should I keep walking? Sit down? Give up? Cry?  Because on this HealthFULL Journey I have absolutely done that list. 



This is me preparing dinner - Braised Short Ribs

So why am I smiling?  Because this is the year I am going to truly lose this excess of 100+ pounds!  How do I know?  Three secrets - I'm claiming my life -meaning I am a true active participant in my decisions, my actions, and my results.  Some may think - aren't we all active in our own lives? The answer is No!  And I know this because I wasn't. I let others make my choices - little things like what do I want for lunch, what show do I want to watch, or what words are appropriate to say.  I don't want to hurt or offend anyone and that means Suzy's opinions get brushed under the rug due to my perception of others.  That's right my perception.  Which is not 100% accurate.  Which means I say or do not say certain opinions because I fear offending or hurting someone else's feelings without KNOWING if it will.  I am a pretty easy-going person - somewhat adaptable.  Most restaurants or meals I can figure out a solution to find something I enjoy or prefer eating and the same with television or movies or can suffer through an episode or two.  But there is a point of being easy-going and totally disappearing into the background as others live their lives around me and I just sit back and live theirs.  Nobody wants that.  How am I staking claim in my own life?  I am choosing my schedule for the most part. Obviously I discuss things with my husband as we are part of a pretty fabulous family unit.  But I am voicing things I think are important - like finding time to work out and a place that will hold me accountable (discuss this more in a moment :)  And I am cooking more for the family.  I am aware of the kitchen and how to actually cook foods and not just heat up a frozen pizza.  I need a little extra time to get organized and build some true cooking knowledge.  I am a beginner and I want to work towards champion status or at least a worthwhile competitor instead of a whiny ignorant novice that freaks out at the sight of the big box like appliance with knobs that spews heat with some hot rings on top.  (Or what most would call an oven/stove :) 

Next secret - getting organized!  See how I actually have the ingredients on the cupboard?  This is a new step for me.  I like to grab random bottles and then stash them away.  Before the meal is cooking our kitchen tends to look like a war zone and no one knows how to help me including myself because the scene is so overwhelming there seems to be no actual step that will make a true impact.  It would make a seasoned chef weep and raise hands in despair.  Also the next picture shows keys in a dishwasher.  You may also notice tiny fingers helping Mommy in that picture.  I have a twenty-one month old toddler quickly on the move.  I want the areas he plays or explores may be a better word to be safe and clean.  He also has started a fun game of let's hide things in random places - Example - keys in the dishwasher.  Had I not seen this happen I am not sure how long I would have looked for these keys.  Alright so I'm claiming my life and making sure it runs smoothly with organization (or at least progresses in a somewhat forward motion ) what's the final secret?

I've got a plan/purpose which is easier to accomplish with organization and that I am engaged in my own life.   What's the plan?  I am working part-time because being home with my son at this precious age means too much to me right now.  Well than why work?  Because we have some bills that need paying and I want to truly lose this cumbersome shell of extra weight.  How does a job help - it occurs at a health facility that promotes christian values, healthy physical lifestyle while also engaging our minds.  I have no excuse to not work out when I am going to be there five times a week - talk about accountability and scheduling myself for success.  That's my immediate plan but I also have bigger purposes to work towards that a physically fit version of myself will have better chance of success.  I want to be a mom again.  Well not that I stopped being one but we would love more children or at least one more :)  Would our son have been born premature had I been more physically fit?  Possibly.  Would I have had an easier pregnancy?  Most likely.  If I can make the next time around easier on both myself and our future child I think we both deserve me at least trying to improve the odds for success of a healthy pregnancy and delivery.  Also, I have felt called to ordained ministry - it is a lengthy fully involved process that I will have a lot of questions to answer on that journey and several deal with my health from all standpoints.  It is pretty hard to answer affirmatively I am in the best possible health when I carry so much excess baggage on my physical frame.  I want to be able to stand up in front of anyone and say I truly live a healthy life and not feel like a fraud.    So how do I move forward with my three secrets?

We all need a little R & R

Great way to refuel with a healthy snack

I go and live my life.  This means finding time to focus on all aspects of my life and not to conveniently skip over the complicated areas.  We as a couple need to find time for dates and to enjoy friendships outside of our trio of a family. But to also spend quality time outdoors or at least outside of our home doors - even if that means walking around the neighborhood more often.  It means that leisure activities not just focus around the dinner table.  For example a zoo outing that encourages family bonding while still walking and no eating.  Crazy - but possible :)  Why look we actually did do that just last weekend. Don't the bear and koala both looked pretty pleased with life as well almost as if they're fully dressed with a smile.

So many blessings are waiting to crowd our daily lives.  Sometimes we just have to open our eyes and acknowledge them with a smile.  Blessings in my life these days are almost too high to count but I would still like to share a few - two cute guys that greet me with a smile every morning,  amazing friends and family, a close connection to God, okay finances, a new job (which was a wonderful answer to a heartfelt prayer), a true purpose with guidance, hope, and time - time to continue learning, loving, and serving such an awesome God.  So you see why it's a lot easier to smile these days.

May your HealthFULL (Feeling Unbelievable & Loving Life) Journey point you towards your purpose that utilizes your talents, awakens your passion, and give you reason to be Fully Dressed with a Smile.  'Til we meet again. . .

Spreading the good news

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others,

 faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. --- 1 Peter 4:10 NIV

My son has a joyful spirit.  He bumps his head and giggles.  He shrieks with delight when others laugh and play along.  And he smiles ....a LOT!  I wish I could take credit but this is his gift.  He loves life....he embraces the moment and without a word challenges you to laugh at the world too.  Drew teaches us to smile at what "now" can bring not what was or what will be but what right now can bring.  He does faces - he's learning to roll his eyes, muster a serious gaze, and show distress but still has a glint in the eye and tilt of the head to share a giggle after he is understood. He makes me want to do better.  To not miss an opportunity to graciously accept the blessings of today but to also seek those moments where I can share my gifts and hopefully add to the glory of God's kingdom. 

For three years I have been sharing on this blog my goal to get healthy. I started writing this in anticipation of the physical pounds just melting off my body.  Sure, I would write that its a journey and a process.  But in my hopes of hopes I thought within a year I would be sitting in my chair typing as my skinny version.  I did not know at that time that the weight I had been carrying wasn't all physical.  I toppled the scale with pounds of hurt, anger, resentment, grudges, disappointments, regrets, and worries - tons and tons of worries that not only piled on the pounds but bound them to my frame.  I had much work to complete, many life experiences to endure, and tons of challenges to conquer.  Many blessings have found our home and covered us in comforts, love, and much hope. Every area of my life has been touched, stretched, and improved in unmeasurable proportions.  But yet the weight remains an ugly picture to such a beautiful journey. 

So this weekend my hubby and I had one of those sincere heart to heart conversations where all the layers of politeness and untruths are left unraveled on the ground leaving only the purest, most sincere answers of honesty remained.  He dug and coached and pulled what I really hoped to accomplish this year.  And after many ----MANY resumes being sent to find that perfect job to replace the nanny job of mine with only five more days  left to work an e-mail requesting an interview found my inbox.  As of today I am re-employed with no days to celebrate my farewell to a summer I will always treasure as I embrace my new role as an afterschool counselor.  The best benefit besides the children I will meet and the work that will challenge me and allow me to share my gifts of education, entertainment, and encouragement I get a free gym membership. Not only do I get to share my faith but I get to be held accountable for my true goal of embracing my physical health.  It's time to get fit and trim.  God will use my strengths but even more impressive is that He will also build up my weakness.  One of my favorite verses is John 3:3 "He must become greater; I must become less."  It can be easy and its always fun to share our gifts and our strengths.  But sometimes the best thing we can do to prove God's awesome power is by showing our weakness and offering it to allow God the chance to display His greatness - for He is the Almighty.    

It was a special weekend for our family and I am blessed to have two amazing guys.  One to teach me the joys of life and one to challenge me to the purest desires of my heart so that I can be the best possible version of myself. 

May your HealthFULL Journey make you Feel Unbelievable & Love Life as you find joy in the here and now by being honest with yourself and sharing the gifts that only you can deliver. 'Til we meet again. . . 

Been Flyin' High

Jesus looked at themand said, "For mortals it is impossible, but not for God;

 for God all things are possible."  -Mark 10:27 NRSV



Flyin' High at Sky

Whoa!  It has been a week!!!  Full-time job and straight to the church to Fly High at SKY for our Vacation Bible School.  (The photo is our actual decorated Sanctuary as our Launchpad for Opening and Closing for every night!) 

I went back in time - sort of!  I revisited the memories of ten years right before I was married. The crazy schedules I kept - the energy and enthusiasm I had for life and how I would need to crash so that I could do it all again.  However, there are some differences. I have a fabulous hubby to vent which is more conveniently stashed in my house than a boyfriend halfway across the country or a state way (only a ten minute drive but a state boundary makes it sound more dramatic.)  I also have a much stronger alarm clock these days.  I remember the days of Snooze making a difference.  Now I peek at the Baby Alarm through one eye open with head on pillow and see if the scream level is at a 3 light or a 5 light on monitor.  3 might settle back into sweet snores.  A 5 red light means better hustle to my li'l one's room because we are ready to start the day.  A decade ago meant if I was home before midnight it was kind of an early night where these days I saw nine on my car's dashboard and I was hemming and hawing how late it got.

And the biggest difference I creak after a night of enthusiasm.  I used to work 3 jobs, perform in two different shows, carry on a long distant relationship, and still have time for friends while being active in church and still have energy to burn.  Ummm I was lucky if I could have a fifteen minute coherent conversation at night with my hubby without ooooh, owie, and uhhing through my painful creaks as my bones rattled and settled.  And I can't even describe the morning routine as I pulled myself to the shower in hopes that the water would moisten and in turn weaken the brittle pains.

And though this week was insane!!! Honestly, more than a tear or two was shed out of pure exhaustion. BUT I wouldn't trade it for the world.  Oh I missed tucking in my sweet boy and relaxing at night with amazing hubby.  *Breathes in deeply with great anticipation* *Sighing Exhale* I tapped into some precious memories and physically recalled my youth.  Forty minutes before VBS started I turned to my hubby with sheer terror "What have I agreed to?" I have been trying to nod with certainty, smile with confidence, and a playful giggle that I got this in the bag.  But with less than an hour to go I had horrible stage fright.  Do I remember how to corral kids in a fun entertaining way?  Can I actually perform with people around once again?  (I truly have became hermit-like in some ways and the thought of trying to entertain a crowd seemed foreign.)  My hubby looked me in the eye and calmly stated - "This isn't something people just forget - you can do this!"  Yup that is one of the many reasons I married this guy.  I am a roller coaster that brings excitement ( the fun and the challenges) and he is my carousel (smooth and steady and calming ;) And sure enough with one rough read of the hastily written script we were out onstage and .....it came back!

The skills, the talents, the experience, and the best part - THE THRILL!  Oh if you have ever performed and enjoyed it - you know what I am talking about.  That moment when the audience smiles because you delighted them - the chuckles as they decide to go for the ride - they're there because they see the sincerity in your choices.  It's like magic.....but even cooler - it was all God!  I used to perform and was good because I bled, sweated, and cried theatre.  But that passion faded as the years past and the skill wasn't practiced.  As I sat at my computer at work the abilities to interact with people, kids especially, drained away.  And then in an instant dose of VBS the Holy Spirit restored talents that I used to take for granted and for them being abandoned for so long came back with a flourish that only could be at God's Hand. One of the comments I received was a question that tugs at my heart - Did you do this in a past life?  I slowly nod even at the thought of that question.  Because it does feel a lifetime ago.  But it also still feels as amazing as it did then.

Anyone looking for a theatre instructor for elementary age kids? Or a permanent VBS leader year round? :)  No takers?  Well I'll find with God's help a purpose for this hodge podge of talents.

The above scripture I referenced is the the theme of the SKY VBS package which you can find more information at http://group.com/vbs/sky .  But it feels especially fitting to me as I remember this week.  My body was tired.  My emotions wrought of the woman I am today and the girl I was who had the confidence to utilize the skills needed.  My mental capacity overloaded as I switched from Mommy, Wifey, to Auntie Nanny to a VBS Music instructor.  And yet - with God's strength I received more compliments than I can recount and am truly humbled.  And compliments even for music of all things.  I remember in high school being assigned a solo in a musical and laughing out loud at the absurdity - I'm the girl who can't sing.  The director didn't laugh. And it hit me like a ton of bricks he was serious. . . and sixteen leaders I am actually teaching others the actions and music.  Life sure is funny - don't forget to laugh along the way :) 

So after my nightly three hour singing/dancing work out I am wondering what to do next week?  My nights sure are going to seem empty.  May your HealthFULL Journey make you Feel Unbelievable & Love Life with reminders of who you were and more importantly who you have grown to be.  Don't forget to laugh at life's jokes!  'Til we meet again. . .

It sure Ain't Easy, but it Sure is a lot of F-U-N!

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,

  according to His power that is at work within us, - Ephesians 3:20 NIV




What I Imagined. . .

What is. . .

I know why we aren't allowed to foresee our lives because we wouldn't take the necessary steps to move forward.  Are you familiar with The Dance by Garth Brooks?  The whole song is about how isn't it great life is left up to chance and choices and surprises then us handpicking our stories.  Why - because if we knew the endings we wouldn't take the beginning steps.  And without that first step because of fear of the ending we would miss too many stories, too many opportunities, too many lessons, and too many precious memories.  We are conditioned to avoid pain.  Do you believe me?  Think of the next time you have to endure something painful - handling paper after paper cut, a shot/vaccine, washing out a wound, touching something hot. How do we respond -  we flinch, we pull away, we hesitate - we react in ways that show caution and hopefully steps that will help us avoid further pain. 

Today was a rough day.  I have decided that torture is trying to put two babies to sleep simultaneously.  Parents of twins - I salute you!  Granted I took a misstep that I will avoid to lessen my chances of repeating this painful scenario.  I forgot my son's stuffed Lion.  It happens, right?  My husband and I are fortunate parents we have a pretty easy-going sweet child (so much more his daddy's son - I just benefit :)  Oh holy Toledo Batman!  This child went ballistic, hysterical, and drove me to tears.  For 46 minutes out of fifty - he screamed, he cried, he pitched the tantrum of tantrums today.  He is twenty months old and obviously does not believe he is capable of a nap without his best buddy!  What was even worse? The three year old was actually trying to "nap".  Usually her and I go toe to toe, but not today!  Today I was locked in the battle of wills - would a nap commence.  I sang, I rocked, I cuddled, I tightened hug, I cooed, I whispered, I giggled, I paced, and my son SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEAMED in my ear, near the quiet three year old.  I finally walked through the house as the other kids were on lock-down while we tried to create a peaceful, quiet, almost serene naptime area for the two youngest.  Sadly, the toddlers missed the memo.  Not one but two children asked why aren't the two youngest asleep yet.  Great question!  And I not had a obnoxious piercing scream destroying my hearing abilities I believe I could have answered more wisely or at least more patiently.  However I sputtered out with dripping sarcasm, "I Don't Know!"  Losing my mind!!!  We returned to the recliner to once again commence naptime.  The tantrum began, the screaming escalated into short breaths of hyperventilation and mutterings of a desperate prayer - breathing deepened, limbs relaxed, and utter exhaustion took hold of both children. 

It would be easy to run my victory lap - I did it - both toddlers are resting at the same time!!! Amazing right?  But it was God's abilities and my willingness to concede defeat.  In our weakness God shows His Glory.  I like to be the best.  I like to attain almost perfect scores and everything to be precise and if I am going to accomplish something I want to knock out a homerun the first time at bat.  Can we all hit a Hole-In-One?  Absolutely!  Can we do it our first time swinging the golf club? Doubtful, but possible.  Will we accomplish this goal every time we tee-off?  Nope.  Should we stop golfing altogether?  Not really. . .We miss those chances to be great because we don't want to risk the ending of failing of hitting rock-bottom. 

I worked for a good company before becoming a nanny.  They were beyond generous and supportive through my schooling, working a second job, and my pregnancy and the challenging beginning days of my son.  But I stayed too long at the office job that I was qualified to do but not passionate to improve.  It wasn't my calling and I knew that far before I handed in my resignation.  But it was comfortable and as I said a great place to work.  They took care of me.  But I began to suffocate and I leapt at the chance to be nanny.  Let me get this straight you want me to hang out and play games with five awesome kids where I can also bring my son to play.  Uhhh Yes please!  I imagined weekly trips to the library, daily adventures through our imagination, never skipping a devotion as we clamored together to share in God's Word.  Ummmm well we have done some of that.  I thought there would be lots of giggles and smiles and fun.  We sometimes laugh and have fun but there is a lot of the backstory I quickly edited from my plans - the bickering, the tantrums, the sulking, the pouting, the fights, the name-calling, the anger, the sadness, the - well you get the point.  It is downright taxing.  And its easy to get caught up in the frustrations - they tend to spurn each other. 

But then whats even better than my imagined version of gumdrops, lolli-pops and oozing sweet pictures of working with children bliss are those quiet moments.  The moment where my son curls into the lap of his oldest cousin.  The squeals of delight from their youngest as their middle child chases her with enthusiasm.  As the whole group deliberates and discusses the most strategic puzzle placement.  The boys reaching a peace treaty to play fairly. 

I wouldn't trade it.  Oh don't get me wrong if you had flashed the emotions and the daily energy withdrawals required by this job I would probably run for the hills.  But for every frustration, every drop of sweat, and every tear shed - I have at least five smiles and giggles upon giggles of what I've learned, witnessed, and been blessed by.  And this is all possible - because I admitted to God - though I was okay at the office job I was weak in passion.  He answered my prayer with a powerful response that maxed out my passion, my energy, and my talents and all he required a step of faith.  Its okay to take that first step without knowing the last - actually its better than okay its what we are supposed to do.  We are tempted to wait for those "perfect" moments but then we get caught waiting as precious blessings float right by.  Be encouraged!  A step of faith may not guarantee perfection but it sure is a lot of F-U-N!

May your HealthFULL Journey be adventurous, full of Faith, and surrounded by F-U-N. 'Til we meet again . . .    



Its not that Health is on the backburner. . .

Its just that there are so many hours in the days!

"So teach us to count our days that we may gain a wise heart." - Psalms 90:12

What do you think? Do we like the logo - or not?

I try! I can not emphasize this statement enough - I try!  I want to be a great mom. A good wife. An awesome Christian.  A wise entrepreneur.  A fun nanny. A sweet daughter. A bubbly friend. An inspirational blogger.  And some days I can hit one or even two of those titles.  But a majority of the time I feel overwhelmed, under-prepared, and pretty much a babbling crazy loon!  And that tends to be the good days :)  No its not that bad....all the time....just some of the time. Part of the problem is I have issues with real concepts vs imaginary ideals on paper concepts.  On paper I can budget to the penny or schedule every one of my "duties" and responsibilities with time to spare for "me" time.  However, in reality the baby doesn't wake up when I pencil in the start of his morning routine.  The traffic in real life never factors in my on paper schedule to be smooth going and no accidents!  And budgeting - let's just say I am using the ads of the 1980's and freak out every time I see a "real" price tag.  What? Bread costs more than a dollar?  A 2 liter bottle of pop costs more than seventy-five cents?  Stop this nonsense right now!    

So what happens?  I do the best I can - its all that any of us can do, right?  We plug along and try to accomplish what we can accomplish in a day.  I was ecstatic for this adventure to become a nanny.  It has blessed me every day - countless times a day - it also has exhausted my mental capabilities - my physical endurance (and this insane heat has not helped!) - and my emotional state swings like a pendulum from the extremes - but we push through, right?  We muddle, we smile, and we hope and pray.  In the free time I try to grow my idea into a business.  So far no takers at www.awriteword.org but I continue to putter around with advertising and the site.  *tweak* *chisel* Think, think, think . . . I send out resumes left and right and left and right.  As I look at the calendar and notice four weeks until my nanny gig is finished.  Its easy at the beginning of a journey or adventure to step out in faith and good spirits.  But as the calendar ticks by my nerves begin to twitch!  I know God has a plan and I can't wait to see what direction we go - but I'd be lying if I didn't say I was a tish nervous!!! 

We have lost the art of the truth in covering up our imperfections.  Oh no I am fine!  We've got plenty of time to finish that project! You look great!  I feel awesome - no these bags under my eyes are just a color palette trick I'm playing - you think they make me look tired - Not at all *yawn* and on an on we spin these tall tales, white lies, little fibs to push through our maniac schedules.  But in the end what is the point of the craziness?  Does my son feel less loved because he had frozen chicken tenders, again?  Did the world stop because I haven't blogged in over a week? You get the picture.  I don't mean to advocate we should all give up our responsibilities.  It is good to be organized and dependable.  But it is also important to acknowledge our human attributes and admit - I am not having a streak of perfection.  However, I can report I am doing the best I can.  I try to find sneaky ways to exercise (whatever you can knock out the earliest is so beneficial - it allows the rest of the day to be bonus :)  We continue to plan our meals - which is a lifesaver repeatedly.  This simple fifteen minutes of truly assessing your pantry bounty and scouring the sales ads two times a week - saves you money, time, and headaches/heartaches. 

I can state that although life feels crazy and my eyes begin to close earlier and earlier with less and less on my to do list crossed off - I am Feeling Unbelievable and Loving Life. 

May your HealthFULL Journey be a time to embrace your FULL health to create your best version of yourself so that you too can Feel Unbelievable and Love Life! 'Til we meet again. . .

Encouraging Words Dear Friends

 I know you're my friend, because we've laughed and we've cried - together!

No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends.  - John 15:13

Time moves quickly and life gets busy.  I think we all know that a little too well.  We count reading a FB status or a Tweet as staying in touch with loved ones.  A quick text is common to communicate family whereabouts.  And not seeing a person you live with for a day or two, is becoming a bit too common.  We forget how as humans we crave that comforting touch or harbor such a passionate desire to hear words of encouragement from those we cherish - and a text just doesn't satisfy those urgings.

I've learned I have a real problem with perfection-itis because I crave those pats on the head letting me know I'm a good girl!

Two days ago was my hubby's and my nine year anniversary.  It went semi-unnoticed from most people including us. We had some obligations and plan to have a grown-up date Saturday night.  Well one of those commitments was a church gathering.  Could we have missed? Sure!  Would people have minded all that much? Probably not.  But as I am cruising on a Health FULL (Feeling Unbelievable & Loving Life - Yep this acronym has changed for the better :) Journey; I have come to realize how important it is to keep real relationships with people past our immediate family that include true connections that extend past the computer or phone screens. And when we met with this group we had a task of creating a bookmark - a simple beautiful bookmark.  Let me correct that - It LOOKS simple.  Oh my perfectionist side came out and she is a bit intense and slightly bitter.  I for the life of me could not complete that task in what I felt was a timely manner.  And though we are trying to complete this project - I missed the true reason of the night - I missed the connection of friends -those moments where you share your happiness and your challenges. 

These last couple of days (and sort of weeks) have been a wonderful reminder of how friends can turn my frowns upside down. I would like to share a few :)

That Thursday night I received a call around 11:30 at night.  Who calls this late?  Those who matter who usually have something important to share.  It was a call from my oldest friend - I am 31 and our friendship has lasted almost twenty-seven years.  Its a call worth taking.  She has some things going on but that's not why she really called.  She just needed to chat.  She needed to shoot the breeze and escape from the intense moments suffocating her life.  She needed to hear that life was carrying on outside of their family's heartache.  A reminder that normalcy may one day return.  She needed that time and so did I.

Yesterday (Friday morning)  I went to work as a nanny.  Many mornings the kids come running out the door to greet me, especially if they know I am bringing my son.  But not a peep - not crazy because the morning was already looking a bit dreary.  I climb the steps to the house that appears semi-dark and open the door to a loud resounding perfectly group of five children shouting HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!  (For a moment I felt like I accidently ruined the surprise for someone's surprise party and realized the enthusiastic orchestrated moment was indeed for me - a day late which may be why it was such a SURPRISE, but still it was very touching :) 

Friday night I texted back and forth with a friend from middle school - We are months shy of hitting our 20 year friendship anniversary mark - wow the significance of my hubby's and my nine year seems to be dwindling quickly :) 

In our brief exchange we shared words about our relationship - triggered high school memories - and commented on the women we are today.  I'm not against texting as it may have sounded early in this blog - but this exchange was a bit sweeter and more current as I did just see her for the first time in three years just over a week ago.  We actually hugged, smiled, and our children played together all in the same room - it was fabulous!!! And a poignant reminder - its nice to have tons of FB friends to share the highlight reel of our lives - but nothing like a true friend with a REAL connection - that not only includes the highlight reel but the backstory, the outline that made this all come to be and the complete story with added commentary.

And dispersed among the stories shared I have received several messages that I wasn't quite expecting - aren't those sometimes the best words to hear/read?  When you see you have an e-mail or FB message there is a good chance you are expecting a reply from someone or the close circle of friends you expect to drop you a line.  But no I had not one but two messages from people that I have shared significant moments with but as friendships tend to do over time have faded.  It's nice to be remembered and encouraged.  I can't express what a blessing they were and how they both touched my heart  to read these words from these special people That's why I picked the opening scripture I did.  Yes sacrificing your life for another is the greatest gift but we only one of those that we can do.  I also like to read this scripture verse as a reminder - that we can daily lay our life down for others.  Would I have liked to go to bed instead of picking up the phone to chat. Possibly I was pretty tired - but my friend needed time and a listening ear - I've been in that spot.  When you already are feeling down and can't get someone on the phone doesn't that crush your spirit just a bit harder?  It does mine. Did the kids have to wish my a happy anniversary? No the day had passed but the extra effort and the sweet intention with such enthusiasm was more touching than a passing almost obligatory congrats.  Connecting with an old friend is always a gift.  But it took coordination, money, time, and lots of effort on both ends to arrange that long-overdue visit :)  And those extra words probably didn't take hours but mere minutes to send my way - but they will warm my heart for quite awhile. 

We forget the little things do matter.  Its okay to take shortcuts now and then (a text, an e-mail) but we as humans do need to lay down our lives - our "busyness" and take time for what really matters to truly share our lives, our time with those who matter.  Because it is in those moments we build, strengthen, and protect our relationships.

May your HealthFULL Journey be filled with heartwarming moments as you and those you love take time to lay down your lives for one another. 'Til we meet again. . . 



Gettin' Down to Business



http://www.clker.com/clipart-2225.html

And you show that you are a letter of Christ, prepared by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.  2 Corinthians 3:3

Life has been busy.  But if it wasn't busy - it wouldn't be life!  Crazy I know.  I'm lovin' life and truly exhausted but in the past week I thought hey lets add some extra fun which I really mean to translate to stress.  Yup stress!  I have decided to create my own business and see what that entails.  I am so excited to share with you my concept - please visit www.awriteword.org to get the full picture. Do you freak out at the thought of having to make a toast or you want to personalize your child's birthday invitations but don't know what to say?  Visit my site where we help you say what you mean with the rights for your special occasions.  There are a lot of how-to kind of sites.  But at my site we don't talk AT you - we collaborate WITH you!

Honestly, I am nervous of failure.  But I am tired of having regrets because too many times I have retreated at the mere thought of failure.  Oh my critic has been yelling non-stop for a week.  This can't work.  There will be too many hiccups.  What if no one hires you?  What if your site crashes? What if *Blah blah blah*!!! So often by the third downer debbie comment from my inner critic I shut down.  But not this time.  This time I seized the day and created a web site.  Was it easy? No.  Was it fun? Sometimes. . . Was it exhausting - A RESOUNDING YES!!! Would I do it again?  Absolutely!

I have learned quite a few lessons on the way in my first full week of starting a business.  My top five lessons or experiences of starting the website. 

#1 - Run the idea by some sane people.  When you are a dreamer like me you should check it with the family and friends you trust.  Sure you may here a critique here or there (and not always strictly limited to your concept.  When you ask for advice beware the gloves may come off and the words may begin to fly. You've been warned!) There is a lot to describe and design. You DON'T have to take every reply as the end-all of the whole project but a diverse crowd gives you a sampling of how the public may view this idea.  Honestly I thought there would be more protests or dreamer wisecracks.  But actually all of my friends and family have been incredibly supportive.  Shocking that those I consider close want to support me :)  I was expecting more protest but have heard a lot of encouragement.  "Interesting concept" - "Intriguing Idea" tend to be the top-runners of the comments.  It's like the world is going silent and people are grabbing their popcorn and drinks and getting comfy.  Will this or won't this idea work? As a hush falls over the crowd their are slight murmurs.  "I don't know if this idea will work but I would love to see the underdog survive to fight another day".  A few people may be ready to see the big fall - but I feel the love of so many others who are ready to applaud. 

#2 -  Since no one convinced me I was beyond crazy for trying this idea I went to www.godaddy.com and purchased a couple of website addresses.  My husband and I had talked about this possibility and there is no time like the present to start.  Then it was time to find a website designer.  I didn't want to pay for a design but then I remembered - I know VERY little about computers.  Enough to type and play games and read my e-mail.  This may surprise you but I d not speak computer code.  It didn't take long to realize that purchasing a web design wouldn't be all that bad of an idea.  I ended up www.Wix.com and www.intuit.com.  Both sites offered a free domain with differrent levels of participation.  Which would have been beneficial before I actually clicked on my first purchase to build this business.  Live and learn, right?

#3 - When you think you have said all you can on the website or that I have reached the elite status of finished through my templates design.  There's more - more to say, more to do, just more - a lot more.  There seems to always be a couple of loose ends to change to tie the whole system together or reach a resolution.  It may be my personal business and some might call me the boss. It tends to feel like the computer may be office manager who doesn't take any excuses or laziness.  So I describe the product, the process, my personal biography.  I flip through images repeatedly.  I lay out words and pictures and hope and pray it is worthwhile.  You begin to type in a zone Again wishing to complete this new adventure and go fishing - but I don't. . . at least not yet!

#4 - Keep the body fine-tuned.  Maybe the rule should read "You should keep the body fine-tuned".I have gotten back on diet soda - a lot!!!  Also chips have been doing the rounds.  And by rounds I mean mouth to mouth - to the hip And sleep - Next question!!! Even now my eyes drop close together in a burrowed brow.

#5 - Sink or Swim ?  It's not easy to say world give me your best shot because every attempt can be the move to stop the company. Or more likely the non-movement - without customers, without advertising - but without their input.  A Write Word.org could be an amaing success or a wild flop.  *Fingers crossed* for the former.  But at the end of the day I can rest my head on my pillow knowing I did all I could - Sink or Swim .  Let's hope for  a swim!

Like a fairytale

He has made everything beautiful in its time.
 He has also set eternity in the hearts of men;
yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginnng to end. 
Ecclesiastes 3:11

http://originalfreeclipart.blogspot.com/2010/08/fireflies.html

Dear Fireflies,

Tonight, I peered through my window
and saw dusk encroaching with a pinkish glow.
The night sky beckoned me
to step outside with a whisper from the tree.


I was enchanted by the colors and the fading light.
It was like the sun wouldn't go down without a fight!
And yet, as the colors fade;
among the fireflies a painting was made.


With the background of the pinkish purplish sky
the fluttering bugs were twinkling their good-byes.
The world seemed to pause at their will,
as all was hushed and very still.


All was still except for those dancing bugs.
There was a comfort within the scene echoed only by precious hugs.
So much in life taunts us that we most likely can and will fail,
but this fragile, delicate moment warmed the heart like an inspired fairytale.


This scene lasted a mere minute, or two.
And yet, it screamed a truth so true;
That beauty, kindness, and love continue to grow!
If we pause for just a moment, nature still offers a breathtaking show.

Bountiful fruit

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,

 faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  Against such things there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23

This verse of scripture literally sums up my first full week of being a "nanny".  The week was as amazing as I hoped and as exhausting as I feared, but most importantly I survived and am better for it.  We begin so many of our days with trepidation.  Will I have enough? Will I be enough? Do I want this enough?  We forget there is another side - that what we have will overflow - that we are more than we think - and that our want will only increase our love. 

I get to spend my days with six amazing youth ages ranging from twenty months - thirteen years of age.  We cover a lot of ground.  My mind, my body (so many aches ;), my heart, and my spirit are tested daily from so many directions.  Because each "child" (I believe we are all children) sees life from a different perspective and therefore has different needs I decided it was good to have a theme each day.  I also figured if I was to pull from any source to be our foundation, the Bible would be the best source.  This week and next we are diving into the fruits of the Spirit.  Each day  a "fruit" is the theme and we plan several activities around this.  And to make it even more diverse and fun I picked a fruit that I felt best represented the "fruits" of the Spirit to tie in the lesson and promote a lifestyle FULL of  Health for both myself and the kids who want to eat/live healthy (like many of us that at least say this is what they want :) 

What fruits would you pick for love? Joy? Peace? Patience? Kindness? 

I chose pineapple, melons (watermelon and canary), olives, pear, and oranges.  What I find a tad funny is the only fruit that I have not physically eaten this week?  Pears for patience.  I feel that it is pretty fitting :)  Also it was the one fruit that the kids all made faces and frowned afraid they would have to sample a bite.  Funny, how patience tends to be the toughest fruit to swallow.

Why my choices?  I picked pineapple for love because it makes me think of Hawaii that seems to have an image of pure bliss as it portrays a calm and loving environment that exudes utter relaxation.

Melons for joy because when I think of summer, fun, and family - we have shared many watermelons.  They are sweet, plentiful, and can get a little messy and everyone seems to have a smile after sampling a bite.

Peace using olives - olive branch anyone?

Patience with pears.  First I have to share my nerdy alliteration pleasure.  I like when beginning sounds play off of each other.  Next, I think it is easy for us to be the opposite of pears when it comes to patience.  We can start our day patient but as the day wanes so does our patience.  We need to be able to build our patience when we are at the point of having only a little bit.  Also a pear is ripe when it is.  It needs time and moves at its own pace and we as the consumer have to be . . .patient.

Last but not least orange for kindness.  I read somewhere that the color orange symbolizes friendship and kindness.  Also think about it - when you eat an orange it is one of the few fruits that once you start peeling lends itself to be easy to "share" kindness with a friend. 

This week has allowed me to sample many fruits - physically and spiritually.  Its amazing when we open ourselves to the world of possibilities - anything is possible and everything changes.

May your HealthFULL Journey include a large variety of fruit to sample- physically and spiritually so that our journeys can be as flavorful and as bountiful as possible. 'Til we meet again . . .

Hot Potato!

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. 

 For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 

-- 2 Corinthians 4:18

Isn't there something almost magical about farming? You plant these tiny little seeds, nurture that seed and it becomes a plant that with enough TLC learns to thrive.  Look closely at the picture above?  Do you see the bountiful harvest?  No?  Its potatoes.  A lot of potatoes! Enough potatoes to require the attention of three adults and five children.  Look closer at the picture.  How about now, can you see the potatoes now?  Probably not, but that doesn't make them any less real.

You don't simply pick potatoes - you have to dig for them.  Our top farmer would use the tractor to reveal the delicious vegetables hidden in plain view.  Then the kids and I would grab our baskets and begin to "play" in the dirt and capture our starchy treats.  And there were many potatoes to be found.  We sought, we dug, and we captured our bountiful harvest.

It was a moving experience.  The sun was shining and the as the soil was scattered - little jewels appeared ready to be harvested.  I have been like the potato which might prove the old saying true - You are what you eat :)  I have been waiting in the dark.  I have been growing.  I have sat silent avoiding early light afraid of a quick dismissal.  But with a few big upheavals ready to show myself and hope for the best. 

Pick me! Pick me! I shout to the world.  Pick me Pick me - the kids say to me daily for numerous reasons:  "Pick me to read!" "Pick me to say grace!" "Pick me to love!"  Isn't that what we all seek?  Pick me to love so that I can show my talents. Let me display all of my growing and that it matters to someone.  That someone cares enough to stop, even for a moment, and say wow I might not have seen it earlier but I see you are ready to be picked, utilized, and loved. 

What stage of growth are you experiencing? Are you just planted eagerly awaiting the future possibilities? Are you in the middle of a deep growth and fear disturbance?  Or are you ready to be harvested and screaming pick me pick me! 

It isn't easy to decipher which stage a seed recently planted may reside.  But with faith and  a tad touch of common sense; we can cross paths with the unseen and harvest the ripened "fruit". 

May your HealthFULL Journey include all areas of growth especially answers of  peace and  revelations of the seen and the unseen.  "til we meet again . . .

I told you there was a lot of potatoes ;)

    

Goodbye SweetHeart Goodbye!!!

Goodbye Sweetheart, Good-bye :)

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

 a time to be born, and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot, . . .

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance. . .

(Ecclesiastes 3:1-2,4)



How many celebrations have you attended?  Think, relish in these precious memories - weddings, birthdays, graduation parties, baby showers, celebrations for the any old odd reason - its a Tuesday, lost the last tooth, holiday gatherings).  Do you have an idea?  Are you laughing at the memories, the jokes that are retold still today about that occasion?  Now with those pictures in mind - how many sweets are present?  Be honest - no quick glances.  A lot right?  Pretty much every one of those memories has a cake battering (pun totally intended:) itself into those precious pictures.  Why? Because we want to make those memories sweet and special enough for those most delicious, outlandish, beautiful desserts.  Were these events about the cake?(I see some of you nodding - no these events were not about the cake!)  Would we have been disappointed as the host or the guest without that sweet treat?  Now you can nod. . .

We do like to celebrate with a sweet concoction to tie the event together.  We like the honoree to see we want to please all five senses - especially visual and taste.  We want this event to be filed under spectacular and fun and "sweet".  No one is grabbing the bitter melon to leave that nasty aftertaste of bitterness.  We want the event to end on a pleasing sweet note of aroma. 

I ponder this symbol of sweet gifts that we want to treat the occasion with a pile of sugar and to mark  that this day is worth the indulgence.  As I bid adieu to my co-workers of six years I picked up a few coffee cakes and orange juice and chocolate milk.  Even the healthy additions of fruit and milk are loaded with sweetness.  But why not? It was my last day and I wanted to thank them for being so "sweet" over the years.  This was a breakfast treat to say thanks.  They returned their gratitude with cupcakes.  Delicious, moist, mini  cakes topped with sugary mounds of frosting with even the selection of chocolate or vanilla.  Then just in case there wasn't enough sweetness a topping of swirly chocolate.  Remember first paragraph we want to especially delight the visual and taste senses.  I was touched my the gesture and of course showed my appreciation by diving in and even bringing a 1/2 dozen home.  (Don't worry these 1/2 dozen were shared with friends and when I say friends not just the me, myself, and I kind of friend :) 

Desserts are our go-to.  They say thanks and this moment is special.  They are easy to be made from scratch and even more simple to pick up from the store.  And say congratulations or farewell!  But another way to look at these sweet treats besides ahh sweet gesture wanting to treat me.  "Here is a pound to add to your frame as a reminder of us here."  And usually we respond through years of training - thanks for the extra pound I am going to carry this pound on my chest next to my heart :)  It is always nice to be remembered but maybe our indulgences for those special occasions have became a little too ordinary - and the occasional indulgence has become more of a daily excuse for excess.

I love the scripture that I opened with.  Ahh Ecclesiastes Chapter 3 you phrase life so eloquently - "there is a time to weep and a time to laugh".  Note how the scripture says that there is A time.  It doesn't say everytime or all the time we should laugh or weep.  Or in this blog eat every sugary treat offered.  Because you will be to many birthdays, many weddings, and many other "special" occasions.  It is okay to say no to the sweet treat offered.  It is okay to just cherish the memory without submerging yourself into the sugar induced coma.  I say all this to myself.  Because I like any excuse for indulgence.  It's "Janie's" birthday - happy birthday Janie pass the cake.  What its three o'clock Tuesday afternoon - where's the doughnut?  Happy Tuesday everyone!  You get the point? 

I loved that my co-workers took time and effort to say good-bye.  But the cupcake was gone within a minute.  The card that I had to read after work (My eyes might have started to water upon opening the card) will be cherished for a long while and the memories with my co-workers even longer. 

As the song goes:

Goodnight, sweetheart
Well,it's time to go
Goodnight, sweetheart
Well, it's time to go
I hate to leave you, but I really must say
Goodnight, sweetheart, goodnight

May your HealthFULL Journey include many special occasions worth celebrating and may you truly celebrate to your heart's content. Because there is a time indulge but also a time to abstain. 'Til we meet again. . .

 

Show your Warts!!!

Show your Warts!!!

How can you say to your brother,

"Let me take the speck out of your eye.'

when all the time there is a plank

in your own eye.

               Matthew 7:4

Dear World, I would like to introduce you to Mr. Toad.  Mr Toad meet the world.  This toad comes and goes as he pleases around our house.  He tends to live around the corner taunting and teasing my dog and then retreats quickly (or semi-quickly) to his home under the garbage can.  This may be Mr. Toad Jr.  as I remember him being bigger in the past.  He leaves me be except for the teases at my sweet puppy.  I try to return the peace to him though I do usually let out a scream when he makes his reappearance under our garbage can. 

But I do respect that he has never been afraid to show his warts. 

As humans we hear "warts" and get a bit squeamish.  We may also begin to recall of the directory of witches from our childhood fairy tales.  But really what are warts?  They're growths caused by infection.  However, we call them anything else to escape the rejection and outcast label that warts bring. We hide our warts through nicknames and harmless labels such as a bump, extra skin, a cut, a blemish, or we may use the ultimate magic tool - the band-aid.  Whats the worst offense we may commit if cornered? Throw someone else in as the target to zone in on by pointing out their wart in hopes to cover our own.

We have trouble claiming the truth and honestly using our words.  Perhaps you hear great news from a friend - promotion, wedding, baby on the way or even tamer news like a new car or a new haircut.  There is a part of you that wants to celebrate but somehow before the words leave your mouth a criticism or a backhanded compliment takes the lead.  Why do we do this?  I believe we say these hurtful words (even if they are not intentionally spoken but inadvertently shared) because we all are seeking acceptance and fear rejection.  We hear stellar news and instead of hearing and celebrating the fact with those we love.  We immediately think of ourselves; how does this news affect our likability?  If you are shining brighter; will that spotlight my flaws, warts and all even more?  So we take the defense to avoid the feared offense.  We make jokes that aren't funny.  For instance - you're having a baby?  That's great news as you're not getting any younger!  Or closer to the conversations I am having these days.  "You quit your job?  That's great - good for you.  I would like to, but I can't because I have bills to pay.  So what are you doing after summer?  Oh! *pause* *grimace* Well I'm sure something will turn up.  So, really you are quitting your job.  How long were you there again?  Six years! Wow - and you have only a summer job lined up.  *pat on shoulder with eye roll* Well something will happen for you.  Good luck *chuckle with glad I'm not in your shoes kind of tone*."

Yep I 've had that exchange more than once.  And I truly believe people are looking out for me and are nervous.  Why are they nervous?  When someone changes the status quo we check our own lives for the aftershock.  If we are worried that tremors may disturb our comfort levels we tweak theirs.  Have you had friend lose weight and without missing a beat offer them a highly caloric dessert treat.  "Really - you've lost fifty pounds! That's awesome - Can I interest you in a triple hot fudge brownie ice cream treat?"  

So by my quitting a good stable job (I cannot stress enough how good my company was to me through some stressful events in my life but that I've known for awhile isn't my passion in life) for a short term but high on my wish list kind of opportunity it disrupts other's point of view.  It reminds me people who are struggling in their job that it is always a choice where you work.  I'm not saying everyone should quit a job they don't like this instant.  But we need to check in and remind ourselves life is full of options. The only thing on everyone's to do list that is not optionable is death.  But everything before that is a choice.  Do the reasons for you to stay at your job outweigh your reasons to leave?  Then absolutely stay at your job and work towards how you can make the situation better.  My scales were tipping the other direction.  God gave me an answer to my prayers.  Which I'm incredibly grateful.  But this answer didn't appear overnight.  It has been a long process. 

We all have our own desires and what we consider prizes.  But in exchange for those gifts we have to put in our hopes, the effort, and the time.  This means there will be some successess and some failures.  But if we get too tangled up in other people's journeys while trying to cover our warts we will lose our own opportunities.  It is good to want to share knowledge, advice, and constructive criticism.  Beware though, because sometimes what it is meant as an encouraging word gets pushed to the back as envy, anger, fear bully their way to the front and escape your mouth without a moment's notice.  Let's share our journey, warts and all. 

May your HealthFULL Journey be aided by those who can help you remove the speck of sawdust from your eye without clocking you in the head with their plank.  "Til we meet again . . .

Water can Heal

Water can Heal

From time to time an angel of the Lord would come down and stir up the waters.  The first one into the pool after each such disturbance would be cured of whatever disease he had.

John 5:4

It never amazes me how soothing and restorative water can be.  When I am sick there is nothing like a hot shower or a cool bath to restore my energy.  When we get stressed at work we tighten almost to the point we turn into rigid stone but a couple of hours swimming in the ocean relaxes us to the point that it all seems to be part of a too-real nightmare.  Sometimes just looking at an aquarium can de-escalate our blood pressure. 


Scrub a dub - dub!

As I face this week of transition; a secure familiar job of six years being traded for a nine week nanny job I am feeling a jumbled bundle of emotions.  I have some frayed nerves that tumble into endless anxiety.  I have excitement that rivals Christmas Eve awaiting Santa Claus as I plan some activities.  I have sadness as I will be turning in a daily exposure of trusted peers and friends for five enthusiastic children/youth who have boundless and unlimited supplies of energy and creative messes to be had.  I'm having trouble concentrating because of part of me is ready to move forward while another part clings to what I know.

So where do I go?  The bath.  The place where I can control temperature and change it instantaneously if needed or wanted.  A place where I can grab a book and stop the alarming pace of whirring ideas.  A spot where water can soothe the anxiety, heal the confusion, and restore my energy and balance my emotions. 

Surprise, Surprise!  It worked.  I remember when we were looking to buy our house I jumped into the tub (fully clothed) to get a feel - could this house be our family home?  Could this tub be my private oasis?  And needless to say - it was and it is.  I remember when my son's temperature was spiking to degrees that I didn't know were possible and not be fatal our first thought was to get him into a bath.  I remember as a kid thinking the tub was a magical place where I created a storyland that rivaled the cartoons "The Snorks" and "The Jetsons" (this may be why I believe my son is part Mer-man ;)  I remember that first shower after delivering my son and that it lasted roughly forty five minutes.  But that shower felt amazing!!!  And when I am beyond ill and I have no energy to climb out of bed to grab a glass of water regain my energy and feel almost completely healed after a shower or bath. 

This passage of scripture quoted above is when Jesus heals the invalid of thirty-eight years and tells him to pick up his mat and walk.  I heard this sermon a couple of weeks ago in church.  But I feel I lived the sermon today.  I was broken and confused and disheartened as I let doubts, worries, criticism circle my thoughts and bound my heart.  But a dip in the tub and peace is restored, refreshed with energy coursing through my body, and cleansed of the negativity. 

Amazing how we can feel downtrodden one minute and the next minute with a change of perspective, the miracle of water and its healing properties; feel restored and once again, at peace.

May your HealthFULL Journey include time to soak in healing waters so that you too can be restored, refreshed, and cleansed.  'Til we meet again. . .

What is that in your mouth?

courtesy of www.vectorstock.com

What is that in your Mouth?

Jesus called the crowd to him and said,

 "Listen and understand. 

What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean'

but what comes out of his mouth,

that is what makes him 'unclean.'"

Matthew 15: 10 - 11

"What is that in your mouth?"  As a mom to a toddler I ask this question more than probably any other question in a day.  And he giggles and continues to chew with a grin.  Nine times out of ten - its dog food.  Ewww!  And what's worse?  I know I am nine times out of ten going to have to go in that drooly mouth full of baby shark teeth ready to chomp because this kid teethes ALL THE TIME.  He has to be on his fourth set of teeth!  But as I asked this question for the umpteenth time today - it hit me.  I ask my son this question ALL the time and occasionally I ask my hubby as he has found something to snack and I am curious do I want that same snack.  But do you know who I rarely ask that question ?  Myself.  I put tons of junk in my mouth and then wonder why my stomach isn't shrinking?  Its amazing what a little clarity does.  The only person asking this question was myself and I got a little antsy as if this was a full on interrogation with a windowless room, squeaky chair, and dimly lit bulb swinging in front of my face.  (I really need to lay off the television cop shows ;)  

I am an adult, a mom even and I still eat as if I was in elementary school sneaking cookies and chips from the kitchen with an extra can of pop.  Who I am kidding?  I'm the one buying the junk food and still I act like an innocent victim of how is this junk getting into our house.  Well I don't want to waste food so I will cram it down my throat in a couple days worth of time.  Because that way I won't eat this guilty junk in the future.  Ummmmm that's still wasting the food but now instead of seeing the food in the trash I see it in the mirror.  The view is still quite disturbing and a bit even more unpleasant.   And what happens?  The cupboards look bare so it is time to fill 'em and wait for it!  Yup more junk food ends up in the cart that I pay for bring home and hide in the cupboards to sneak once again when no one is looking except me.  Ummmmmm anyone else see a problem here or there?  

I tell ya that toddler teaches me everyday, a little about him, a little about me, and a lot about the world.  As I mulled over this information because I didn't like the unsettling feeling it was stirring I googled-  Putting things in our  mouth scripture.  Googled was ever so helpful and changed my phrasing to what it felt I meant to say.  Good job Google!

It lead me to Matthew 15:11 - "What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean' but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him 'unclean'.  It wasn't what I was looking for exactly - but better.  That happens a lot when you are in the middle of the journey and taking the path that seems best at the time.  You don't always end up where you think but instead find the best moments of the journey by accident. 

I was worried what was going into our mouths - my son Drew's maybe too much and mine not enough.  But my concern should be more on what comes out of our mouths because they come from our heart as we read in Matthew 15:18.  Could my words be kinder, more gentle?  Am I speaking in patience or from exasperation?  Do my words match my actions or are they hypocritical?  Are they too harsh?  Should they be more encouraging? For example, I say I want to get healthier and lose weight.  And yet, I don't ask myself enough what am I putting in my mouth?  And more so, what is coming out of my mouth? 

We may be what we eat, but we people know us by what we say?  What are you saying and sharing with the world?

May your HealthFULL Journey lead you to answers for the tough questions and  to questions that will help shape your journey. 'Til we meet again. . .