A child's delight

It is my child's joy that keeps me on this journey.  I may slip.  I might fall.  I sometimes faceplant.  But I cry it out, laugh it off, and pull myself together to do it all over again.  However, I am trying to figure out my son's endless joy.  I TRY to keep things interesting and he just loves it all.  I work towards a goal and if I meet it before even celebrating I am thinking what should be my next goal.  Not my fifteen month old.  He truly captures the moment and lives in that second.  He cries when he is upset, he laughs when he is happy, and actively observes in between.  For example, last Sunday I decided it was a good fort day especially after our little church meltdown - my meltdown though my son contributed.  All I am gonna say is we were fifteen minutes late, handed in our offering, was ready for the sermon, and then my son started babbling and getting antsy - we stepped out for what I thought would be a minute to compose ourselves or the whole sermon as my son planned and one of us might have lost our pants (that one was my son - although I was the one probably mortified).  But again perfect example - I was looking forward to worship - the singing - the sermon.  And my son was excited to see so many people, and have room to crawl in the narthex which is crazily empty during worship :) Although I do tend to enjoy my pastor's sermons I probably will remember spending time in the quiet narthex with my son more in the years to come then the exact words that were preached.  Do you get caught up in the shoulds, the coulds, the woulds, the goals, and the events?  Or are you like my son and  you just live and breathe in the moment? 

Anyway, you might understand why I thought it was fair to have an easy afternoon?  Who doesn't love a good fort?  My skills are rusty but vast improvement from the one I attempted a month ago.  I am trying "to plan" and design a sturdy fort - with the ease of being casual and just good fun.  (but then the competitive side leaps forward and screams in my head this is going to be the best most perfect fort ever designed.)  And my son?  Sees a new obstacle and lunges for the half up sheet which is not sturdy by any means and certainly isn't ready to brace a quickly moving 21 1/2 pounder.  I kept telling him "Just wait, when the fort is finished we'll have so much fun".  And he responded with giggles as he threw himself repeatedly into the sheet or covered his face with excess sheet for some peek-a-boo.  I half laughed, sweated, and muttered about how this fort was going to be a success if it kills me.  I am rearranging furniture and huffing and puffing.  And my son is rolling on the floor laughing and pounding on the "new furniture" as it takes new location and climbing under and over EVERYTHING! 

Once the fort was up my son stood proudly under the draped sheet and tried to touch the "ceiling"; as time passed this challenge became easier and easier. He scooted and laughed until his heart's content.  I turned on Mr Popper's penguin and decided Mission accomplished!  There was so much fun to be had and I missed some of it because I was so caught up in the destination.  Not my son - he didn't miss a second!  I kind of believe he added seconds with his endless delight :)  It was the journey with twists and turns of what is going to happen next?  When the sheet wouldn't stretch far enough and started to flutter to the ground.  I thought Argggh! "stupid clothespin!"  And my son saw "new game", or "How cool! it covers me and I'm hiding.  I'll have to dig myself free!"  I had a minor heart attack as one of the chairs fell; while my son saw a new climbing challenge.  He feels the moment and I run right through them to get to the next moment. 

I have a lot to learn from my mini muse.  I look forward to smaller sizes and pounds lost.  But that is only results.  The journey is everything else.  I like to check off excercise from my to do list.  But I need to be grateful for that time of feeling healthy, embracing time with my son, and growing stronger in all aspects of my life.  I mentioned my son because he is my cheerleader, my inspiration, and my number one fan.  He applauds my crazy dancing.  He eagerly crawls into my arms when I am marching around the living room.  He tries to steal my pedometer :)  But most importantly every day he lets me know I matter.  And because of him I need to continue to get better and improve by moving forward.

May your HealthFULL journey highlight those people who matter: those who inspire, encourage, applaud, and share in your journey. 'Til we meet again. . .

 

Revising, Revisiting, and Rebounding

Taking the HealthFULL approach means to Fully Understand Life by Living; which means a lot of trial and error.  Also it means a lot of revising, revisiting, and rebounding. In regular speech revising means constantly seeking out ways to improve my lifestyle, revisiting is attempting to deal with issues too tough to deal with the first (second or third) time around, and rebounding is acknowledging not every attempt is a success.  For instance I am learning how I approach an area of change depends a lot upon my mindset.   Boundaries are good. Goals are Great! But I find rules to be no fun:(  When I first tried a pedometer it did me no good.  I saw it as another critic - which was the last thing I needed at that time.  But now I see the pedometer as a coach/cheerleader.  Each step pushes me to challenge myself with another step and another.  When I cross different milestones I smile as the zeros are like cheerleaders cheering the victory chant.  So those numbers of steps I see as an ally and a positive reinforcement. 

My no munching "rule" after ten pm is an excellent theory.  But it drives me to grab as many snacks as I can at 9:30 pm.  Which defeats the purpose of theory completely.  At 9:30 pm I am not grabbing a snack because I am hungry.  No I am grabbing a snack because I am proving to myself that I have willpower and I MIGHT be hungry at eleven or midnight.  I somehow have to teach my brain to think of that late night snack as not a need for survival or a craving that will break me.  But I am struggling with how to teach myself to resist unless I am truly hungry.  Cravings are tricky.  They will tempt you anyway possible and tend to sit on your sensory drives.  It taunts you with flavor memories coating your tongue, or flashing images inside your mind to appeal to your visionary senses.  So I am struggling now with that late night snack.  How do I view this as a boundary but not a rule that I will want to break? 

It might be better to scrap the late night munchie rule.  I think I was eating less before the limitation was placed in my thoughts.  But now as the ten o clock hour looms I find myself jettiing off to the kitchen for that one small delicious bite which I enjoy another twenty times over.  However, as in any good journey and this has been a doozy it should be experienced: day by day, minute by minute, and even second by second.   I need to reteach myself to eat when hungry and not in fear of a craving that may or may not occur four hours later. 

May your healthFULL Journey stretch your capabilities but not crash over you with limitations. 'Til we meet again . . .

Supermom Jeans are here!

The power of my new jeans brought me a grateful puppy, compliments from my hubby, and the squeals of delight of my son.  Yes people these jeans were magical and transforming.  But how you wonder.  Because they were my "short-term" goal jeans.  I bought them last week in hopes of fitting into them soon.  They are two sizes down from jeans I bought this past summer.  So I washed them and then tried them on for a fit and they fit.  Not perfectly, but not where I have to lay on my bed and exhale all my breath (girls may understand that sentence more than the guys :)  So today I put them on and it was pure magic.  I smiled, I felt pleased with my efforts.  I haven't bought this size since my honeymoon (summer of 2003!!!)  If you can do math or at least "Suzy math" that means I subtracted approximately eight and a half years.  Wow! I am a girl back in my twenties and not a bedraggled mom in her thirties - no wonder I had a smile.  But not only did the confidence that these jeans radiate cause me to smile but those around me.  I had lost some of my "control".  I've admitted to several people that recently I have started to "recall/remember" my spontaneous side.  As I've grown older and trying to keep chaos to a minimum I've adopted a lot of "routines" and schedules to help keep things in line.  Organization is good - routines can be helpful.  However as Julia Roberts as Vivian in "Pretty Woman" said " I would say I'm a kinda fly by the seat of your pants gal, you know moment to moment."  Once upon a time I was a fly by the seat of your pants and loved chaos. It was challenging to think of my feet.  And somewhere in the twists and turns of life I let go of chaos and clung to routine.  Which it was good to get organized but sad to leave such a huge part of my personality in the years of yesterday.  So today with my supermom jeans I let  today guide me, I let logic and practicality take a backseat. 

This afternoon I texted my hubby if he wanted to run to a discount warehouse store instead of him picking up the couple of necessary items on the grocery list.  That's right in a day of spontaneous actions we threw out the list!  We had no dinner planned as our eggplant curry would be without eggplant or with spoiled eggplant and we decided skip the curry!  My dog Belle came inside and she was covered in grass!!!  She has been wriggling on the weirdest things lately.  I thought it was because she wanted to share her scent or pick up the new scent.  So as I grabbed her brushing mitt and stepped outside with her and my toddling little boy.  I realized she is shedding and rubbing her fur against anything to get rid of her winter coat.  So I brushed and brushed, and petted and petted. (In my new supermom jeans no less !)  Then I noticed I don't let my son play outside enough and decided today is the day to remedy that. (even though he just had a bath not even five hours earlier) But no fear of mess on a day that welcomes flexibility and chaos if it comes.  He loves to play in the bath and sneaks off to play in the dog's water dish.  With a beautiful day outside happening and my dog's fur flying in the wind; today is the day where I have promised my son that he could play in a basin of a water, make a mess, and be a kid.  I grabbed the supplies and let him have at it.  Since I was outside I decided to take a little time and start raking our yard of all our "gifts" from our stupid rubber gum trees or whatever they're called.  It gets daunting to think of doing the whole yard so if its all or nothing.  Nothing usually wins.  But today something was better than nothing.  We don't use our yard enough.  My dog wants to be chased but I trip on those li'l gifts from the trees.  Today I started to clear a patch for Drew to wander and Belle to lounge.  As I raked up my five small piles (still in a sweater and my supermom jeans!)  and watched over my son giggle in pure delight and sit in soaking wet pants my dog Belle laid down in the center of the freshly raked piles.  She looked at me with puppy dog eyes and bowed her head in a show of gratitude.  Then my hubby came home as I was giving my son his second bath of the day and that is when the compliments poured in.  What I accomplished today, that he had a happy son and dog (and somewhat cat - but can we really tell when the cat is happy since he does whatever he wants whenever he wants all the time?).  We hit our warehouse shopping without list and managed to cover dinners for tonight and most of the week .  We got home and I hacked up a fresh pineapple - all thanks to the supermom jeans.     

No my jeans probably aren't magical (although I will do another test run to test this theory)!  But it did feel good to feel free, flexible, less rigid, and in the moment.  It was reminiscent of a part of me that I let go.  Slowly I am tugging that part of me back in today's world while still holding onto the more mature organized self that can finish projects.  Because chaos girl was great at starting things but when you are always "in the moment" you forget to shut off running water, complete unfinished chores, and leave calls unreturned.  A woman who appreciates a little mix of schedules and menus with on the feet ingenuity may just be who I want to be when I grow up. Thanks supermom jeans for bringing a smile to my face and a sparkle to the eye of those I love.  (If you look closing at the bottom right of the screen door you can also see our disapproving cat Smokey.)

May your HealthFULL Journey remind you of the good of the past, the amazing possibilities of the future but only after you have had the chance to truly embrace today.  'Til we meet again. . .

Sour face!

Well it is that time of the week when my hubby and I choose our fruit of the week.  Usually we tend to stray towards exciting veggies or fruits with mystical names, or well know but rarely bought.  This week I have to confess as a couple we bought our first grapefruit.  We both have tried grapefruit in the past (when we were quite young).  And this week's was a challenge to face a flavor that neither of us have fond memories of tasting.  Several times in the last month we have heard that broiling grapefruit is a great way to taste the sweetness of this fruit.  We took this word of mouth as a sign we should sample this great smelling citrus fruit once again.

Ummmm I still don't like it!  I have tried it raw and now broiled and I still just find it incredibly sour.  Yes broiling the fruit helps.  It plumps up the inside sections making the fruit plump with juice.  With the juice heated it does bring out the sweetness of the fruit.  However, I still just get this incredible hit of sourness.  The sourness is so intense on my tongue that it almost tastes bitter.  And I like sour - rhubarb, love berries, enjoy lemon and oranges , but grapefruit just doesn't do it for me. I even enjoy the smell of grapefruit. Which is kind of sad.  Because grapefruit specifally helps regulate blood sugar I read in a little diabetic booklet. 

It was kind of funny watching us both try our grapefruit halves.  It was like two kids trying to hide their food under their napkins.  I tried mine first.  In hopes that I didn't like it I could finish the meal with flavors I prefer (poached eggs with toast).  In my head as I chewed the sections I grimaced.  I tried not to show it on my face and discourage my hubby from tasting it himself.  But he knows me too well and realized that my silence to his questions was screaming loud and clear "This stuff is still bitter!"  If I had to eat grapefruit I would prefer it broiled.  But otherwise if my choice most likely this fruit will not be entering our kitchen for a super long time. 

I do encourage everyone to re-visit foods that are low on their lists of favorites.  Our palettes do change.  Giant straws of sugar at the age of twelve sounds delicious - at thirty one sounds kind of gross and absolutely sickening.  Green vegetables at eight sound like torture but as a mom sound nutritious and tasty.  Things change and its okay to reevaluate where our opinions lie.  Sometimes as humans we like nice and neat answers.  Favorite color blue - because it has been since I was nine.  I like math because I used to be good at it.  We cling to who we were because it simplifies things.  But we sometimes lose our own truth when we reach for who we were.  Its okay if purple is your new favorite color.  Its okay if The Lion King is no longer a favorite movie.  Its okay if you are better at Science now and not as good at math.  Life is about change, so it is good to revisit and see if our perspectives and/or our opinions have changed.  This opinion about grapefruit happens to still be the same but I didn't know that yesterday and today I do.  Today it is truth that I don't like grapefruit.  Yesterday, it was only a guess that I didn't.  Stop guessing about your own life and get busy living it.

May your healthFULL Journey help you discover the today's version of you - not who you will be, who you want to be, nor who you were.  But the person you are today so that you can appreciate everything about you and build upon your real version of yourself - not the concept of you.  'Til we meet again. . .

Quitting time is 10 pm

For as long as I can remember I enjoy a tasty snack - salty or sweet, sometimes both, and usually late at night or early in the morning depending how you look at it.  A couple of posts ago I introduced you to my Slobberin' Sal the Snacker.  Well one way I am try to kick my snacking habit (or at least take more control of it)  is to not eat anything after ten p.m.  For a lot of people this is a super simple rule.  However, I am a late night owl who loves to veg in front of the tv with a bag of chips (not for quite awhile) or a big bowl of ice cream (I will plead the fifth to that last discretion :) .  But I do get the munchies horribly late at night which is not good.  A book I am reading points out how our bodies don't require the carbohydrates at night especially enough to fuel a marathon. And I do love a carb overload kind of snack late at night in front of my guilty tv pleasures (reality tv at its finest!).  Also I tend to wash these snacks down with a wonderful carbonated diet beverage that I like to call pop :)  Another guilty pleasure I am trying to curb.  We are roughly twenty fours away from the Lenten season and though my denomination does not encourage a sacrifice during this Holy Season I believe it is a practice that I like to participate.  I find it challenging, comforting, and an opportunity to show God my weakness and connect with the Trinity in asking for strength to kick out unhealthy habits and unholy rituals.  And my drinking pop has sadly had its moments of idolatry.  So it is time for me to let go of this bit of unhealthiness at least for the Lenten season (Hurry up Easter!).  I tried last year to give up my diet soda and sadly I was too weak in the eleventh hour.  I just clung to my chemical, caffeine, carbonated liquid.  I have tried to wean myself off to avoid the withdrawal headaches if at possible. 

Hopefully (hands clasped), these two small diet changes will work together to lessen my cravings and continue to up my energy (and the compliments :)  My hard work is actually being noticed in the real world and that is so affirming.  It boosts my confidence, increases my pride, and drives my determination to kick some of  this extra fat to the curb for good.  I am getting compliments on my appearance which is nice but an even better affirmation is hearing enthusiasm in my own voice.  For instance, today I received a call from a program with my insurance.  Since I have some medical conditions (diabetes, high BMI, and blood pressure issues) that place me in the high risk category for poor health I have to speak with a nurse that checks in with me that I am keeping a close monitor on these conditions (meeting my doctor , aware of my "stats/numbers/readings", continuing to improve my exercise and eating habits.  This was our initial "meeting" and I was pretty pumped to talk about my health.   It feels good to say why yes I just met with my doctor last week and these are my awesome results.  A perfectly good stranger is proud of my progress.  Usually, I take these kind of programs and nod my way out of the conversation like a bobble-head.  Yup, yes, sounds good, nope no questions, yep will work on that, *nod* smile "great idea" yep I 'll get back to you.  But today I had answers to share, a smile on my face, and had no problems sharing the truth.  I didn't feel ashamed, embarrassed, or shy.  This is a pretty big deal for me.  She asked how I would rate my health ( poor to excellent).  I hate one word answers - black and white scales.  Say one number or one word.  I live too much in flux to say yes I am at a level 4 or a level 9.  Because if I answer that it is in that one second I can answer but you want an average.  Interviewers want one concrete answer to write in their survey for "accurate" results and clean averages.  Well life is messy, especially mine so you will always get an on the border reply.  I don't like to be caged in and just to keep your numbers neat and tidy isn't a good enough reason for me to lie.  I answered I would say a "high good" or "the brink of very good".  But as a nurse she is reading my ailments and my weight.  That does not compute or sounds like I am in denial.  So I continued my answer "  I finally feel like I have control of my nutrition and exercise."  And explained some of my number results and she was pleased with my progress.  Is there room for improvement - always!  But I am a long way from the person who started this HealthFULL Journey who took two days of debate to share my weight on my facebook status and after I did immediately signed off and freaked out at home.  Not checking back for twenty-four hours.  Now I am excited to talk about some of my experiences on my HealthFULL (Fully Understanding Life by Living) Journey; what I feel has been successful and what didn't really work for me. 

So off to a little television watching with no snack (because quitting time  is 10 pm) and a nice giant cup of water.  There is one pop can chilling in my fridge for my Mardi Gras Hurrah!  And with my pedometer closing out at 10,036 I feel it is time to bid adieu.

May your HealthFULL Journey include many affirmations that remind you the extra efforts (big or small) really are helping to shape the best possible version of you. 'Til we meet again. . .

That first step. . .

This whole journey has been filled with first steps.  Retrying first steps. Re-doing first steps. Repeating first steps.  And the whole process after a strong first step ...baby steps.  So many times I charge gung ho down the trail.  Let's do this!  We can do it!  This feels awesome!  To quickly retreat the next day (or halfway through my own personal pep rally) thinking have I lost my mind?  I can't do this....I don't want to...this stinks....no fun! ....and blah blah blah.  Sometimes I argue with myself just put the tennis shoes on.  If nothing else happens so be it.  But at least tie the freakin' sneakers unto your feet.  So I tie my sneakers and never have I decided that was enough.  I figure once I have the shoes on my feet I might as well use them.  I work great with boundaries.  I tell myself "You just have to do one lap but should probably stop after four laps.  Or walk as much as you can in fifteen minutes."  This gives me limitations so I don't feel like I have to walk to New York and back to feel I've accomplished my task. Challenging enough to get me off the couch but not overwhelming that I feel there is no point to give up the lounging. 

Also I need something to add change to the daily work-outs.  For awhile the new DVDs from the library were great motivators.  Then my goal to cover an extra mile boosted me to walk daily.  On the new horizon I have a new pedometer.  Noticed I said new?  Yup I have tried the pedometer in my past.  But I didn't like mine it didn't motivate, actually it discouraged me.  I had purchased one with the intention of walking 10,000 steps a day as that should be my goal according to an article I read at my heaviest.  At my heaviest weight this might be shocking news.  I was not walking anywhere near 10,000 steps.  I wasn't even walking 5,000 steps a day.  I was walking in the ballpark of 2,500 steps a day.  That included work, leaving my apartment, getting ready and I barely covered a mile within a day.  That is heartbreaking. And discouraging.  I was barely covering a 1/4 of my goal.  So without much intention I began to forget my new friendship with the pedometer and let it stink into the miscellaneous drawer with much adieu.  However, now I am ready to add the pedometer into my daily routines.  My average routine consists of 5,000 steps without even trying. (Vast improvement from seven years ago).  This pedometer is actually a tool purchased by my company to encourage a healthier lifestyle.  My cost is zero dollars which makes this free!  Who doesn't love a bargain these days.  It tracks your progress online and rewards you for the different milestones you achieve with different prizes.  Ahh now some friendly competition - excellent!  I have worn my pedometer for three days.  The established goal is to walk 7,000 steps a day at least five days a week.  But in my head sits that old nagging number of 10,000.  Because once you hit 7,000 why not try for 10,000.  However you get extra points for walking 12,000 steps in a day.  So on my third day once I hit my 10,000 (which I had done the first two days!) why not try for 12,000 and I did. Hopefully you can read the 12,069 in the picture as proof I'm really doing this.  I really am onboard this time to be the healthiest I can be. 

I am not the only one "stepping" up my "A" game.  As a Valentine's Day surprise our little boy decided to take his first steps.  Five to mommy and five to daddy.  I figure if my son is going to start walking; I better push myself past that first step as well. 

May your HealthFULL Journey begin with that first step and quickly multiply.  'Til we meet again. . .

Make your dish a Superstar!

How is one quick way you can jazz up any dish with a bit of whimsy?  Starfruit!!! I love dreamlike shapes (hearts, stars, moons,smiley faces).  I have been intrigued by this fruit for years.  But kind of nervous to try.  If you pick up the fruit it has a waxy texture to the outside.  The thought of peeling this fruit is a nightmare.  But after reading a couple of facts about this beautiful fruit I learned that most recipes recommend the fruit to be eaten in its raw state without peeling the waxy layer.  Its recommended to cut the fruit into THIN vertical slices so that you can maximize the fascinating shape.  Another reason I was tempted to stay away was that I thought the fruit would be overly sweet like a pineapple.  As the starfruit (a.k.a. carambola) ripens it moves from a greenish tone to a bright yellow.  Think of the coloring of another tropical fruit like the banana.  When unripened there is a greenish hue to the fruit and as it ripens it develops an intense yellow shade of color and once you start to see brown spots the fruit is beginning to become overripe.  The texture of the waxy peel is hardly noticeable once you cut the slices thin.  Also when you think of tropical fruit ; it is easy to imagine a juicy, sweet bite.  The starfruit is quite crisp - think of the crunch when biting into an apple - there is that really bright crisp bite.  However I found the flavor to be more like a dry nectarine.  The flavor is familiar but not automatically common and the tone doesn't linger on your taste buds.  It really is a great addition to a salad.  First it adds such a dazzling display as a garnish or topping to the salad.  Plus with it not being overly flavorful it blends really well with other flavors but gives that fresh bite and sturdy texture with its crispy bite. 

Nutritionally, there is a lot of good that comes from the starfruit.  Like most tropical fruits it is a vitamin C powerhouse.  It is a lot of fruit for a little amount of calories. The average starfruit will only cost you about forty calories with a good fiber exchange.  According to this website http://www.produceoasis.com/Items_folder/Fruits/Carambola.html : a starfruit has the ability to meet fifteen percent of the recommending fiber intake.  

A starfruit is really easy way to try a new produce item that probably isn't common in your household.  It is mild flavor.  Easy preparation before eating.  Wash the fruit under water, remove the ends, and slice vertically.  There were about three seeds that were easy to spot near the center of the fruit that we just flicked out with the knife.  And voila you have a fruit ready to eat.  Plus it is star-shaped! How much fun is it to eat foods in fun shapes?  And this one is naturally made like a star. 

May your HealthFULL Journey delight you with the beauty and whimsy of nature. 'Til we meet again. . .

Sometimes ...Duh!

Do you find yourself going merrily along the way and then have just a total ditzy realization?  Yeah I've one of mine.  So a good snack that I like to munch on is a mini bag of popcorn.  Well I like to jazz it up sometimes with a popcorn seasoning.  It makes me think of spending the night at a friends house and being super excited that we could have cheesy popcorn.  Since this was not a product my parents bought until I begged after having cheesy popcorn at my friend's.  So as an adult I enjoy this right to have chemical powder on my popcorn.  So one of my recent purchases was seasoning to make the popcorn kettle corn like.  Now I am trying more and more to "read" labels.  And actually make a conscious effort on not only what I buy but what I choose to eat.  It is easier to stay away from the junk food if I don't buy it in the first place and that it doesn't take residence in my pantry mocking me.   So I looked forward to my popcorn treat and grabbed my brand new kettle corn "spice".  Decided to read the ingredients.  Ummm sugar, salt, and then two chemicals.  Yeah - I am an idiot.  Because first off I shouldn't be buying anything where the first word is sugar.  And two.  I spent almost three dollars on this spice that I have the two main ingredients in five pound bags sitting in my cupboard.  And probably spent around the same price for my pounds of sugar and salt that I paid for this little "salt" container size.  Yeah - and what really steals the cake - I didn't really taste the "spice" on my popcorn.  So not only do I already have the product in much cheaper form in my cupboards - I didn't enjoy it.  So yes please hand me my ditzy award now. 

That's why its a journey.  Because I can take a step back and laugh that I don't have all the answers.  That every day is a new lesson to learn.  And what were the lessons we learned.  READ THE LABELS.  Buy consciously.  And don't throw money away for a product you already own! And try to be more successful in avoiding the ditzy fog.

May your healthFULL Journey be filled with laughter, lessons learned, and few ditzy stormclouds. 'Til we meet again. . . 

The Munchie Monster

Let me introduce my munchine monster - Slobberin' Sal the Snacker.  Oh boy does he have a huge appetite.  His superpowers include being able to snack on large amounts of food in one sitting and he loves to fill the belly with snacks that range from sweet to salty, from chewy to crunchy.  My munchie monster prides themself on being able to pick the perfect snack to gnaw on during the perfect show.  You want a lighthearted comedy with sarcastic asides - popcorn or a big bag of chips that you eat one by one, satisfying crunch followed by yet another satisfying crunch.  Tearjerker romance definitely a big bowl of ice cream with all the works.  Sal struck hard tonight and I have to tell you he usually is very convincing.  He whimpers and to the kitchen I run.  But tonight Sal and I tried an experiment.  He shared his request with a moan and a grumble in the tummy.  However, instead of running to the kitchen - I ran away from the kitchen up the stairs.  This confused Sal.  I had my Rocky moment with the fists in the air.  *Ha ha Sal no snacking tonight out of comfot, boredom, or whatever mood you are feeling.*  And then Sal laughed, harder.  Rarely  have I challenged my Munchie monster - we're old pals why start an argument?   He fought back with pictures of satisfying sweets, flavor memories trickling down my throat.  The munchie monster pulled at my stomach and displayed different snacks in my thoughts like a fast food commercial set on "repeat" with an endless budget.  I am trying to distract myself first with the computer and then tv.  But tv is less a distractor and more of a comrade of Sal the snacker.  They go way back.  I am trying to teach myself.  I can actually watch tv for the fun of watching tv.  It is rare for me not to have the remnants of snacking surrounding me on the couch - wrappers of tasty treats while I watch the dvr.  A couple of nights I have tried to trick slobberin' Sal the snacker with hot water and lemon.  The satisfaction of flavor while watching tv without the calories.  Sal was not fooled but also not angered.  My munchie monster feels I am ignoring him and he would be right.  Its time for me to form new habits. Which means I have to re-train my appetite.  When am I REALLY hungry?  And when am I just thinking I am hungry with the help  of my munchie monster?

Its hard.  But every minute that passes is a victory.  Because slowly Sal is losing his hold and once again I am starting to claim more of me; which means I take responsibility for my choices - to snack or not to snack is only the beginning.  Which means I have to kick my munchie monster to the curb.  He did a fine job - he scared me, he upset me, frustrated me, disappointed me, and occasionally comforted me and sadly enabled me.  He helped me rationalize, pat myself on the back, and let me lie to myself.  But no more.  Good bye munchie monster!

If you see my munchie monster - Slobbering Sal the Snacker.  Give him my regards - he was a dear friend at one time but sadly are paths are going in different directions and at this time there is no hope of meeting again.

May your healthfull journey illuminate your true friends.  May you learn who is valuable and who is best to cut ties. 'Til we meet again. . .

The Heart of the Matter

Today was a great day!  Today was a follow-up appointment with my doctor.  She entered the room with a big hug for me.  I have to tell you doctors, hospitals, and the like make me nervous as I tend to have bad experiences or what we'll call "interesting" visits.  But I do believe today was the first doctor visit my doctor entered the room with a smile that only proud parents tend to share.  My A1C Results were in....*Drumroll please*  6.1  !!!! Yay!  That is awesome compared to four months ago and my results were *gulp* 10.2.  For those who don't know the A1C test is a three month average of your glucose levels.  Healthy people typically range 4 - 6 on this test.  Pre-diabetics run about 5.7 - 6.4 ( I fell in this range this time around :)  People with diabetes usually have a result of 6.5 or over.  I believe 12 is the highest score.  But doctors tend to get nervous with anything above a 7. Some would describe this as uncontrolled diabetes and research tends to push that concern as a score above 7 on the A1C tends to be a patient with a lot of complications from diabetes.  So a score of a 10.2  is cringeworthy.  It means on average my blood sugar readings were around 246 mg/dl but now my sugar readings are closer to an average of 128 mg/dl.  That's a pretty awesome change in results and now you understand why my doctor greeted me with a hug.  I am pretty excited.  Especially, as I was hoping for a little more weight loss on the scale.  But since my first visit to the doctor on October 4, 2011; I have officially lost 15.2 lbs.  So yay (and that included the feasting holidays.  Also it was the first good blood pressure reading on the first attempt I have had in the doctor's office on the first try.  As I mentioned I get super nervous and anxious in a doctor's presence and that tends to mess up my blood pressure readings.  So overall good visit with actual tangible results showing me that the extra effort is most definitely paying off.

So to celebrate my hubby and I planned to celebrate Valentine's day a day early due to our schedules.  We had a lovely steak dinner with a heart-shaped rib-eye (my husband is a meat manager) so this held some sentimental factor.  He also surprised me with a dozen white roses which happens to be my favorite flower.  They smell divine and already are so pretty.  After our delicious steak dinner with a baked potato, green beans, and lovely salad (strawberries, avocado, mushrooms on mixed greens) we tried our first chocolate souffle.  Oh they were delicious !!!  And so much fun to create together.  When cooking together we have so much fun.  We laugh, we talk, we get frustrated, but through it all we work together as a team to create something worth remembering - a treasured memory and hopefully a scrumptious meal. 

So the heart of the matter is enjoying health.  I still have a long ways to go but it was so uplifting to hear positive feedback through the test results and affirmations from a super pleased doctor.  But what was even better was enjoying a special evening with my forever valentine: who was ecstatic about the results, happy to share time with me, and reminding me that we both still have a lot we want to accomplish - as individuals, as a couple, and as a family. And by making a lot of small choices the benefits of a healthier life are already coming back tenfold.  My heart is growing stronger and filling with a bit of extra pride.

May your HealthFULL Journey help to pump up your heart; so that is may be stronger, happier, and healthier.  'Til we meet again. . .

Feeling lighter

Feeling Lighter

Its nice to see the numbers lessen on the scale

But thats not my only reason to cheer.

I stand proud because I didn't quit, nor bail.

When I look in the mirror; I rarely jeer.

No longer do I load myself down with shame.

No longer do I wear guilt like a shawl.

No longer do I shout to those I love, hate, or the world why they are to blame.

No longer do I feel alone and that there's nowhere to crawl.

I smile because I feel joy.

I grin because I have energy and want to play.

Everyday is one more day I get to laugh with my little boy.

I am happy and ready to face  the day.

Oh don't think life is perfectly breezy.

But this healthfull journey has stretched me and helped me to grow.

I no longer need the world to be easy

Because I am strong enough to not feel trapped but ready to go.

My body feels able.

My mind feels bright.

My emotions feel stable.

My spirit feels light.

So yes I feel I have lost weight,

But it wasn't just the pounds that made me frown.

It was the negativity, the withdrawal from life, and the self-hate

That was keeping me down.

So as I chose healthy food

and to exercise daily instead of acting like a stone;

My spirit soared and so did my mood.

Now, I'm feeling "in the zone".

Feeling lighter.

Feeling bliss.

Feeling brighter

Feeling that I can't miss.

I still have a "weigh" to go,

but it is an exciting transformation to see.

Because continue to grow

Into whom I've always wanted to be: a lighter, better version of me.

Do you feel robbed/Rabe'd of nutrients?

I tried tying a pun into the title but if you don't know broccoli rabe you probably don't know the pronunciation for "rabe" sounds like rob.  Anyway, guess what?  The Sullivan household tried our new veggie for the week and drumroll please it was broccoli rabe or a.k.a. rapini.  We have actually bought this vegetable before and let it spoil.  No chance this time.  We picked it up from the grocery store and cooked it tonight without a recipe in our hands.  Quite daring, for me at least. 

When picking out the new produce for the week I knew we were eating an egg casserole crockpot meal.  I wanted a side for dinner but didn't want anything heavy or too many carbs as there is bread in the casserole.  In my thoughts I was trying to think breakfast like items.  Fruit was a possibility but I kind of wanted a vegetable.  As I was cruising through the produce section I was looking for what jumped out.  There it was Brocolli Rabe next to the fresh greens and leeks and peppers.  We have had this on our list to try as we have seen several cooking shows use it in their recipes. 

A green seemed like a perfect side.  Now how to prepare it.  I have heard that it isn't a bad idea to blanche greens to rid them of their initial overwhelming bitterness.  Plus the instructions said to rinse well.  I stuck our broccoli rabe in a big bowl with cold water for about twenty minutes and then used a colander to rinse and let it dry a bit before cooking.  Next how to prepare a vegetable I have never had the pleasure of tasting.  Both my hubby and I agreed the stems looked a bit woody for consumption.  Think ends of asparagus.  So we chopped off the thick stems.  I then chopped through the leaves, mini stems, and what looks like little brocolli clumps or florets would probably be a better choice of description.  As I was chopping I shouted out to my husband that they reminded me of weeds.  His response in a sarcastic voice "Sounds delicious.  I can't wait!"  Don't let the sarcastic tone fool you though - he loves when I take charge in the kitchen.  The man eats tofu if it will get me behind the stove :) 

So where are we?  That's right I have chopped up weeds on my cutting board.  I said weeds because the leaves remind me of those thistle weeds that pop up in yards.  They have those jagged edges that sometimes look like spikes.  I decided the easiest way to prepare the green vegetable would be to wilt/saute.  I first paired the green vegetable with a few of our house favorites.  Thinking the green would be a tad bitter especially as brocolli rabe (or rapini) in its raw state has a dark green tone.  I did nibble a bit of the vegetable in its raw state.  It was pretty mild.  I thought the floret portion would remind of brocolli and it was too mild to have that brocolli flavor.  Quite earthy, a tad bitter, but really felt the flavor was closer to a mild lettuce.  This may be from the little bit of  the "soaking" we did.  I wanted a sweeter vegetable to combine it with our green.  I don't know about you but in egg dishes we like caramelized onions and cooked mushrooms.  So I started sauteing diced onions and sliced mushrooms.  If you want to branch out and try new produce;  never be afraid to combine them with flavors you already know you enjoy.  I then deglazed the pan (or added liquid to pull away the cooked bits) with a thimble full of white wine.  Another way to add a dash of flavor and sweetness.   Dumped in the chopped up rapini and let it wilt down. After wilting the leaves, the brocolli rabe takes on this gorgeous bright green hue.  I did include a picture of the final outcome at the top.   I think the whole dish took less than twelve minutes ( minus the soaking and draining time) to prepare.  At the end I added a little bit of salt and cayenne.  At first bite I wanted to add some sweetness.  I actually considered a drop of maple syrup as it was a breakfast side.  But waited to let the vegetables cool a tish.  And I was really glad I didn't add that sweet flavor.  The greens worked really well with the "heaviness" of the egg dish.   

After cooking my version I looked up the vegetable on the web for some nutrition tidbits and noticed that a lot of recipes encourage the saute method.  Its pretty easy and quite tasty; just mix in a couple other produce items to add some texture and a spice or two to highlight the flavors and you've got own version of this brocolli rabe dish. 

Here is a quick nutrition plug of why broccoli rabe is good for you (low in calories with some great vitamins).  I found the following nutrition information at : http://sarah-zahn.suite101.com/what-is-broccoli-rabe-a165036 which also gives some more tips on how to eat this kitchen friendly veggie.

Nutrients Found in Broccoli Raab

Broccoli Rabe is highly nutritious and contains many of the same cancer-fighting elements as its cruciferous relatives. It is high in phytochemicals such as sulforaphane and indoles, which are believed to help the body naturally defend itself against certain cancers.
It has a mere 20 calories per one cup raw, 3 grams of protein and 72 mg of vitamin C and 7.6 mg of beta-carotene. It is also a good source of vitamins A and K as well as potassium.

I have to admit I am quite proud of myself. I actually conceptualized a dish without too much background information.  I did make a mess in the kitchen because I am still working out my chefly kinks.  It reminded me that once upon a time I was pretty good at thinking on my feet and ready to take whatever came my way.  Its been awhile since I have had the confidence to stay standing.  It has been a lot easier to hide my head in the sand, bow my head, or turn my back.  This felt like me taking a little bit of a stand and saying to the world "Let's go!" 

May your healthfull journey find surprising ways to pat you on the back and allow you freedom to roam.  Who knows you may stumble upon a new path or find a familiar one from long ago. 'Til we meet again. . .

Power down! Deal with it. . .

Oh if the world truly graded our efforts and not the end result both my hubby and I would have A's for the day.  But instead we grabbed our remote flipped on our newest episode of "The Chew" and stuffed our faces with Chinese food.  This wasn't the plan but then every attempt of a schedule or plan for today met with obstacle, snub, or just plain didn't happen.  We tried.  Both of us.  In our own way to make today a great day but pffffffffffffft was much of the reply.

I woke up to the sound of an unhappy baby at six a.m.  I went to check up sound asleep.  Back to bed for mommy.  Then seven-thirty one blare of a scream with no follow up.  I took it as an early alarm that would allow me a chance to get ready for the day.  These are rare moments that I can piece together two thoughts to kind of get a plan for the day.  So I was grateful and got ready. No more awake sound in the first thirty minutes.  Awesome I am on a roll.  This mama is going to get some breakfast together.  Another fifteen minutes pass and still silence.  Now frustrated because I probably could have gotten a work-out in.  And then - yup - there it is the scream of a disgruntled morning toddler.  Drop everything and immediately head to the crib.  It's like the gunshot at a race to start my crazy day.  On your marks get set - GO!  Already point down -wet bed.  Boo!  But no problem an extra load of laundry on the to - do list.  Will get in the wash later as we have a hungry boy on our hands -  grab today's outfit.  Then a quick breakfast and we begin the baby olympics to burn off energy.  Up the stairs like a rocket (he doesn't walk but give him a set of stairs and he can move!)

Oh no - stinky meter rising as we climb the steps.  Quick descent with the help of mom unto clean diaper.  Then to the fridge to play with our magnets.  Really? Stink meter is going off again - not a good sign - maybe false alarm  - oh no no no!  Definitely not a false alarm.  Unhappy baby changed again and then walking with assistance.  Going to impress our Early Interventionist who is due in three minutes...oh no sleepy baby has struck down my boy.  We are rubbing our eyes, yawning, and becoming a limp noodle unresponsive to even the tickle monster.  Our E.I. arrives and the little boy is exhausted.  Wake up baby boy you get to play with someone besides mommy with new toys - YAY!  Slowly he responds until he finds the bubbles.  He is quickly revived and enjoys "popping" bubbles in the living room.  Yay!  Next round of breakfast and sleepy boy hits.  Good timing.  I sneak him into his crib with a few protests and then golden silence. 

I slip into my work-out clothes, grab my water bottle and reaching my hand out for the stairwell.  WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!  Seriously?  I drop off the water bottle enter the doorway of our son's room and wha....*gag* never mind figured out what woke you up.  New diaper time.  Oh and look not ready for a nap now.  Let's go and play in the living room.  We need a quiet activity.  Sesame Street it is.  *world judge me if you must - I know children under two shouldn't watch tv and my response I don't do it everyday.  And when he does he rarely gets more than one Sesame Street episode a day.  I say rarely because today he did - and there are just worse crimes in the world than a two sesame street episode in a day*.  I got some paperwork done and some little cleaning jobs.  And the kid was exhausted.  We grabbed milk and listened to some music and tried a nap again.  Not very happy nor cooperative but we finally reached the silence stage of the house again.  I grabbed my bottle and headed upstairs.  Who knew how long this nap would take so I paid a couple of bills due on the computer and turned on my Wii Fitness. 

Error message - Wii Remote needs replacement batteries.  No problem I'll just grab a couple and pop them in.  In the zone let's get our sweat on.  Wait Error message.  Just replaced the batteries - oh no the Wii board needs battery replacements.  Grin and bear it.  I'll just go and grab some more batteries.  Okay they're replaced.  Let's weigh in - and the Wii cursor is stuck on the screen.  Why?  Oh you've got to be kidding.  The wireless remote sensor needs charging.  Hear this message world : I am working out today!  So throw me your obstacle course but I am even more determined - battery replacement, upset child, and uncharged sensor - pull it together.  Yay success - I've lost 5.3 pounds in 2 1/2 weeks.  *happy dance*  Caught last night's "Parenthood" while I stepped my way through thirty minutes.  Bye bye 200 calories - hello guilt free afternoon.  Wait is it still silent?  I am grabbing me some lunch.  Two meals in quiet - wowsers! Still quiet I am going to actually sit on the computer for fun.  Sitting down. . . .and yes there is the cry that my lunch hour bell has dinged - finished.  Back to baby duty.  Coming love. 

Lunch is ready to be served.  Oh we did not like the lunch menu that we have previously loved.  Carrots not on the baby's menu today - however you can find carrots on my floor, in his high chair and I am pretty sure on my piano.  Awesome!  Let's play some more.  Oooh checked the clock daddy will be home soon.  Should straighten the house a tish and get baby laundry in the washer. This requires a bit of movement on mommy's part in different rooms.  So let's place the baby in his crib to play with a couple of his favorite toys.  eight minutes tops!  Well look my mother in law is at the door as she is helping my hubby go pick up our car in the shop(stupid battery - wait is that this week's theme that no one told me about - power down - work around it).  I would help but out of two vehichles only one is baby friendly.  The other is a truck.... with an air bag. So no go - and no hubby at this point.  No problem.  Ahh the sound of hubby's arrival and the squeals of delight from our son.  (Everyone in the world lied to me.  When I was pregnant and shared I was having a boy.  Everyone smiled and said - oh the relationship between a mother and son is so precious.  No one mentioned that its precious but won't compare to a daddy's boy which we 100% have. Which I adore - but slightly get jealous of - especially the "rougher" days.  Mommy = tears - Daddy = giggles of delight.  Sorry for the tangent!)  So quick stop just enough to hear that hubby was late but most likely had to return to work because the store lost power as he was leaving - COME ON WORLD!!!   Our son was kind of sad to see his daddy go so soon.  So yup Sesame Street it is again.  I never do this.  But if the world is going to bring me down, turn off most of my power -then I will do what I can to finish the day with a smile on mine and my son's face.  And I wouldn't change our second episode.  I got toddler cuddles for almost an hour.  And that was a pick me up I definitely needed.  We played unto dinner.  Guess what peas were not on my son's wish list for the day either.  More of these in my son's chair than his belly.  I even gave it the yummy in my tummy with thumbs up and lots of smiles after obnoxiously cheerful big bites.  (p.s. I am not a fan of peas.  I will eat them mixed into other dishes and enjoy a good pea soup.  but eating straight up peas = unhappiness. Maybe it reminds me of a Canadian Anglican Priest shooting them at me across the dinner table but I'll stop with that tangent as well.)  He did agree to a few bites.  Some more floor play -  tickle session - he loves this falling down game on the bed - we played that.  Oh look bath time YAY! 

Bath time almost broke me.  I was setting up a couple of items and Drew was playing with the hair rinser.  (A pitcher that has a flexible top to bend around the head to keep from soap dripping in his eyes or water down his face.  )  I didn't realize he was actually pulling water out of the tub until the second attempt.  When water went sloshing all over the bath mat.  And as I reached for him he got in a third fill-up and shared that with the toilet seat cover and waterfall effect over the other side of the toilet.  Oh this awesome day gets better and better.  Now we have WATERWORLD.  And I haven't even attempted washing down the baby yet.  YAY!  So I grabbed the not wet but SOAKING (could he have really filled the pitcher all three times - as much water as I was cleaning - possibly!) bath mat and toilet seat cover and to the washer they go.  Throw down a couple of towels to mop up extra water.  Phone rings hubby can finally return home.  Power has been restored and product was back on the shelves.  I begged for chinese.  I was a weak woman who didn't have plans of cooking and I could tell my hubby didn't have plans for cooking either.  Chinese it is!  With a vigor to my step as my better half was soon on the way home with a piping hot supper. Onward to bath time.  We got through bathtime okay.  He was like a seal pup that kept sliding through my hands and his trick was to splash "the audience" meaning mommy and the rest of the bathroom with his own created typhoon while I wrangled him into sitting positions between scrubbing and rinsing.  I should have worn a swimsuit. 

But we made it to pjs and our nightly bottle.  Hallelujah!  So no not the day I planned.  Not an everyday kind of day in hopes to see results on the healthier side of things.  But a good day with a 100% survival rate.  I shared today because it was a real day trying my best.  I tend to blog when I am on the successful side of things.  I am usually on a high and want to share my good news.  Sometimes I am on a down day trying to pick myself up.  But there are those in between days - like today - where there are some great highlights (down five pounds and got a 30 minute work-out in even with some obstacles) - but some not great choices (like chinese food with sauces and fried foods).  These days are a part of the journey.  I constantly strive for improvement (well perfection if I am honest but I am working on IMPROVING my unrealistic expectations :)  but settle for doing the best I can , with what I have, where I am.  And today I was home stranded without a vehichle with a cranky energetic little boy missing my better-half  and a craving for Chinese food. 

May your HealthFULL Journey include the unscripted moments so that you can really see the new you emerging.  Because when the power goes down we all have to deal with it. "Til we meet again. . .

Are you who you think you are?

Are you who you think you are?  Cliches and general statements claim no one knows you better than you know yourself.  But that isn't true for everyone.  And sometimes I wonder if that sentiment is true for anyone.  We aren't aware of other's perceptions and rarely are we as transparent as we think.  We get in silly arguments that blow into full wage wars because we believe those closest to us should know what we meant or what we thought when really none of our actions have fully disclosed our needs or our wants.  Or worse our words and our actions told different stories. 

Do you ask for something but mean something completely different?  Perhaps you ask children to do more around the house.  They do more around the house but you are frustrated because you had specific chores in mind they didn't touch.  Maybe you ask your significant other for more loving touches but you tend to shrug off their advances.  You ask work for more responsibility - you meant promotion they give you grunt work.  We tend to ask in generalities but desire specifics.  Either we don't know what we want or we don't know how to ask for what we want.  Either way we could improve our position by knowing who we are.

We tend to not know our own strengths or weaknesses; at least all of them.  We tend to quit because we are scared of the end - we fear pain, hurt, success, failure, sometimes we just fear "the end".  So we quit, we drop out, we grasp for excuses to share and crave rationalizations that comfort us why we couldn't possibly go all the way.  Oh I could do never do a marathon.  Whew I get worn out walking in my living room.  What? I couldn't speak in front of hundreds of people - I get tongue tied in front of a small group of five people I know.  I couldn't draw to save my life.  I could never be a parent - too much responsibility.  Its fine if you choose not to do something because it is not a desire of yours.  But don't be scared to challenge the warrior, the mother, the athlete, the poet, the champion in your heart.  They are dying to strut their stuff.  Because when push comes to shove you could complete that marathon; perhaps it is in honor of a charity who is sponsoring your best friend. You could speak in front of a thousand people because you are sharing the gospel of Jesus.  Maybe you become an artist because you sketched your baby's first nap.  Its amazing what we can do because the stakes change and become personal.  Possibly we know that greatness is as close as our fingertips and that we are only a step away from knowing ourselves and that is why we tend to push people away.  Its becoming quite a habit in today's world.

Do you like compliments?  You might say you do, but it seems the truer the compliment the quicker we are to deflect it.  Someone compliments you for your speech; we may reply its an important topic.  Someone compliments your cooking perhaps you share the accolades with a spouse - something along the lines of "my husband is the true chef I am just the assistant.  Someone compliments your intelligence or beauty and we pass on the praises to our sibling - oh you haven't met my brother/sister they are the smart/beautiful one.  Here our compliments to our face and we still don't accept our strengths or talents at face value.  And our weaknesses are just as hard to swallow.  Raise your hand if you have ever been completely honest at a job interview or on a dating profile.  Name your greatest weakness.  We all go for the positive spin.  Curvy women you know you mark the voluptuous curves before the bloated jellyfish box.  Or for work purposes - I tend to be obsessed with details.  Forget to mention that you run tardy by ten minutes every day or that you like to gossip with co-workers.  But then maybe you don't realize you have flaws because you didn't really know you have strengths. 

I write all this because without knowing yourself : How do you live YOUR life?  This HealthFULL Journey is really helping me to pinpoint specific wants, needs, and patterns I possess.  And with the help of my handy dandy 12 resolutions for the 12 months of 2012 I am holding a magnifying glass on all aspects of my life.  One of the most recent items that spurned this blog.  A big grocery shopping trip my husband and I recently shared.  The revelation after $450.00 worth of groceries (it was bargain shopping as everything was 50% off so we spent just over $200.00 and our pantries are filled and some of these items went in donation).  But after this huge shopping excursion we realized I shop for a non-existent member of our household.  This person obviously loves cereal, yogurt, soup, beans, pasta, spices, and nuts.  If I go shopping by myself I tend to stray from our list badly.  I will ultimately pick up these six items and I honestly can't remember ever in our marriage of us being out of these items.  I put these items in our cart as if I am on auto-pilot. 

Let's investigate the list shall we:  Cereal - I love cereal.  The sugary kind, the hot kind, the healthy adult kind.  I enjoy cereal.  Now ask me how often I eat cereal.  Hmmmm....since October I have not had a single bowl.  Yup that would be the truth.  I sometimes use it as a crunch factor in yogurt or with fruit - we are talking 2 tbsps max at a time and occasionally a 1/2 cup here or there for cooking purposes.  My husband never eats it and my son eats one specific kind.  But right now we have the total of 3 unopened containers, one opened box (our son's) and two boxes with three different kinds mixed together separately in their own bags.  So if you're counting that equals ten different cereals. 

Yogurt - oh I love yogurt.  I grew up eating yogurt.  But since the attacks have increased I have suspicions they may be linked to dairy (which literally is a nightmare for me - both an attack and the loss of dairy).  Also I tend to buy many yogurts fully knowing it has a limited life span before the expiration date and I don't try dairy after the expiration date.  One bad episode with an expired date and you get a little cautious. But I like variety so I'll pick up ten yogurts thinking I have just under a month.  I won't eat them all.  I hope I will eat a couple of them before they find their way to the trash.  When I want something sweet they usually aren't enough to satisfy the craving or they're too heavy/much sounding when I just need a bite.

Soup - I so rarely eat soup from a can.  I'll use broth for a meal every now and then.  But I like to have them on hand just in case I get in a cooking frenzy and am in need of four broths.  We tend to open a package of broth or stock and then maybe use half and once again find its way to the garbage.  We are trying to be more conscious and use items within several meals to cut down waste.  But I still way overbuy soups in anticipation to feed our family a full meal for less than $3.00.  Good dream but not really our reality all too often.

Beans in my mind equal a healthy diet plus the general public states beans are cheap to buy.  So in my cart they go to make my family healthier while maintaining a line of budget.  This however means they need to actually be utilized into our meals.  And the thought of soaking beans is exhausting.  I think like many people I get the impression I have to physically stand over the soaking beans for eight hours or delay our meal for eight hours.  But in reality we just need to throw them in a pot of water (no cooking required at this stage) when we go to sleep and throw them in the crock pot in the morning.  Or throw them in a bowl of water before we head to work.  Ready to cook as soon as we get home.  But the step of soaking them exhausts my mind and there the beautiful different color beans sit in my pantry in their lovely bags.  I also overbuy canned beans because sometimes the draining them and rinsing them exhausts my mentality as well.  Because then I'll convince myself that canned beans aren't as healthy as dried beans and if I don't have the time to soak my beans I don't deserve to sample the tasty beans.  Yes people I seriously think in these circles sometimes :)

Pasta is my cruel way of teasing myself.  It is one of my five favorite dishes of all time - between comfort, ease, variety, and flavor.  I adore pasta; the different shapes, the different grains; the satisfaction of covering the noodles with tons of different toppings.  But alas with diabetes pasta is rarely my friend and I tend to scoff at their serving size.  But yet I buy it because I always am in doubt if we have enough in our pantry when I really know I shouldn't be eating that much of it so even having one package is plenty. 

Spices - I am starting to flex my culinary skills and I don't like when my pantry is missing a recommended ingredient.  I get frustrated when I can't try out a new recipe as I am out of or never possessed a certain spice; fully believing the whole recipe hinges on that one particular spice.  And those we tend to like but rarely use I like to buy back-ups just in case we are low (as you see two tumeric, two thyme, two pepper blends, two cayennes, and three sets of food coloring).  I must fancy myself quite the chef and baker which according to my pantry I am not.

And finally the nuts.  I actually eat quite a bit of nuts.  Lower in carbs, high in fat - mostly good fate, and an excellent source of protein.  These quell my snacking tendencies and cravings.  I can purchase sweet varieties and salty and even spicy.  Therefore, I panic at the thought of running out.  So when we see them in the store the cans literally jump into my cart as I peruse the aisle - just in case.

I admit all this because I finally have my eyes open to some self-awareness.  I challenge you to take a true look in the mirror, checkbook, pantry, closet, and/or calendar.  Are you who you think you are?

"Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes', and your 'No,' 'No'; . . . " Matthew 5:37

May your HealthFULL Journey be a true reflection of the person you were, the person who you want to be, and most imporantly the person you are. 'Til we meet again. . .  

Bringing more Green into the World

Think Green.  We use that color to explain so many things - clean environment, safe products, money, the color, someone is looking sick, jealousy.  We like this color, we use this color, we discuss this color.  But do you eat this color?  Oh I know you just blushed.  Because we love green green but many of us as kids decided that healthy green vegetables have no place in our world or our tummies.  But as an adult we are told these foods are "good for us" because they are so "healthy".  And our reactions range usually from "Blech!"  or if I must *take a bite with eyes closed super tight and nose plugged with other hand while other hand holds the fork ready to jam the green health food into our mouths.  I should preface most adults are like this who haven't really given "greens" a chance. 

Actually, they are quite tasty.  Are you thinking I am a pod person?  No I am one of you I promise.  Green vegetables to me used to mean no flavor or rabbit food.  But as I allow myself to use them more often I am becoming more familiar with their tastes and textures and what works for a meal (at least in our household) and what most likely won't be crossing the threshold of our home.  If you haven't guessed yet we ate Turnip Greens for the veggie of the week.  Quite tasty and now having sampled a variety I can share a little bit of their differences. 

We'll call them the Big Five Greens. (If for no other reason because our household has sampled all five and they are fairly common at popular supermarkets so you can too sample all five and pick your favorite :)

If you shop at Whole Foods they label produce with ANDI scores.  According to http://www.belsandia.com/andi-score-andi-nutrition-rating-system.html ANDI stands for Aggregate Nutrient Density Index developed by Dr. Joel Fuhrman which
basically identifies the most nutritional bite you can chew meaning high nutrients for less calories - this works high in the favor of greens but works against healthy fats (nuts, olive oil).  So though I find the information interesting and worth learning it - by no means should it dictate your diet completely.  Eat with knowledge is what I advise (and I am just a person with little nutrition background - more of a recent hobby and by no means have a doctor license.)

So our big five green choices: Kale, Mustard, Turnip, Collard, and Beet greens is what I plan to compare.  First off the first four listed: Kale, Mustard, Turnip, and Collard Greens have an ANDI score of 1000.  Which is the highest score listed on the ANDI.  Beet greens come in at a much lower number.  I think in the 300s but I had trouble finding the actual number online. 

My favorite green is the Turnip Green which we just tasted last night.  We cooked it typical southern fashion where you boil it down with spices and some tasty fat.  Not the healthiest preparation but I think is a great way to introduce yourself to the vegetable.  They have a bit firmer texture than collards but definitely not as strong as kale.  So the turnip greens hold up really well for a soup or the boil down method.  And then you can use the stock to create flavorful rice or soup.  The turnip greens have a great spiciness to the ending of their bite that allows it to incorporate with a smoky, salty, or sweet flavor.  We ate the greens with some cod and a little bit of rice and a cool cucumber salad.  Odd mixture but we were trying to finish up some odds and ends.  The greens mixed well with the whole meal. 

Second up for my favorite are beet greens.  They have such a delicateness to their leaves and sweetness as they carry some of the beet flavor into their red veins.  We wilt these down in a saute pan with a small amount of liquid (a flavored vinegar usually and some water just to wet the pan and allow the green's water to do the rest of the wilting) with a bit of salt and pinch of sugar (to really highlight the greens' natural sweetness) a bit of pepper or other "spice" and you have a delicious, nutritious, and super easy side.  I think this green is a great way to incorporate greens into a kid's diet (or the apprehensive adult).  The liquid clinging to the greens is usually tinged red which adds some color, beauty, and for the crowd who appreciates it a bright purply tinged blood :)

Third I will go for the much talked about superfood - Kale.  Kale is a strong leaf both texture wise and flavor.  Its dark color is from all the nutrients that call this vegetable home.  Kale is strong enough to handle some baking and many people I know brag about Kale chips.  I have it down as a recipe to definitely try ( I do warn you the smell in the oven is a bit strong - think burning leaves - but the taste is fantastic :)  We have had kale several ways.  Raw in some salads - such as a quinoa salad with some fruit to sweeten the salad.  We have also half wilted, half sauteed the leaves.  I prefer cooked kale vs. raw kale.  I feel it holds a bitter taste which I am not a huge superfan.  But have learned it can work when balanced against other flavor profiles. 

Collard greens are a staple around these parts of the country ( I am based in South Carolina).  I can honestly say I do not recall ever seeing Collard Greens let alone ringing them up (I worked in a grocery store for 7+ years in northern Minnesota) until we moved here.  And my husband remembers eating them for most New Years' Days.  For the last couple of years we have tried to uphold the Southern tradition of eating black-eyed peas and our collard greens to bring us both luck and prosperity into our upcoming year.  I find the collards a bit more fragile than the hearty greens and a bit more mild. Kale has bitterness, turnips have spiciness, and beets have sweetness and collards just are collards in my opinion.  We have only had collard greens in the boil 'em down fashion.  Maybe worth trying a new method for these.

And my least favorite green are the Mustard Greens.  I truly believe this has to do with our preparing them like collard greens and drowning what I imagine to be a sour spicy flavor.  I enjoy true mustard taste as was quite disappointed that I didn't love these greens thinking these would be my most favorite.  Maybe I went into the tasting with too much expectation.  They also are pretty hardy for leaf strength - not quite like weight lifter kale but runner - up definitely.  I haven't given up on these leaves yet.  They deserve a second chance but with a recipe more their style.

Hope this gave you a new understanding and appreciation for the world of greens.  Don't be afraid of them (you are even stronger than kale.  Imagine how strong you would be if you ate kale  :)

May your HealthFULL Journey be filled with culinary adventures, active happiness, and inspiring motivation. 'Til we meet again. . .    

Avoiding Waste

Well its no shocker but I really like food.  Have a bit of obsession with yummy treats.  So it seems fitting to start my charity giving with a food cupboard donation.  We actually just dropped off the food today but I honestly pulled it out of our cupboards January 31st.  I am so lucky to have a person in my life who completes me.  I am a dreamer with lots of ideas.  LOTS!  Not all winners but some good ones.  However, I tend to get bogged down with the gazillions of details needed to complete these numerous tasks.  God blessed me with a hubby who can sift through the clutter of tedious details and help me complete a few of the projects while sometimes quashing a few of my dreams in a wonderful loving way so that we can merely function.  I say all of these compliments because with his assistance we got the food to the right people: Harvest Hope Food Bank.  We dropped off a box full of twenty-two items.  And sadly, our pantry is still bulging with goods.  A great way to gather goods/food for other people while still keeping within your own budget is to shop the buy one get one free sales.  You aren't truly overspending for the item and are sharing with the food pantry what you consider a good purchase.  You are feeding the same item to your family that you would give away.  That's truly a way to love your neighbor as you love yourself. 

The food pantry idea came from a show my hubby Corey and I watched on the Food Network several weeks ago titled The Big Waste  with several TV chefs.  The goal was to cater a large event with food that would be considered waste (about to be thrown away and has no sale value).  It was heartbreaking what was considered waste.  Watching produce be thrown away because of blemished.  And I have to confess I am a produce snob.  If you aren't shiny enough, blemish free, or look questionable I won't choose it.  After this show I am buying a little more practical.  Blemishes for the most part can be cut away.  Too much of our produce buys have been trashed because of little inconveniences.  Sadly I am not alone in this country with my snobbish ways.  Perfectly edible tasty food is thrown away because of our need and search of perfection.  So many people in our country are going hungry and I refuse to cut away a bruise a centimeter in diameter on an apple.  And with all of us handling the produce like a jeweler with a loupe we are creating most of those bruises in the first place.  Another big waste we have in our country are chickens' eggs.  If they come out slightly a different color or the size is too small or big they get trashed because of no resale value.  The size affects packaging and most of us freak out if our eggs aren't white.  We have been taught they are white - therefor our logic if the egg isn't white it isn't good for us to eat.  Admit it - if you saw a blue tinged egg in a carton you aren't buying that carton of eggs. 

We have enough food in this country to feed our people we just aren't connecting all of the dots.  We have safety guidelines which is good to keep most of us safe from foodbourne illnesses.  We recognize food is usually perishable (and for the most part what isn't perishable we shouldn't be eating a ton of anyway).  And even today my hubby who is a good sport and listens to my rants and soapbox appeals quietly reminded me to not be such a hypocrite.  We bought cucumbers semi-recently and they both felt waterlogged with a bad spot.  I was ready to throw them they cost a total of a dollar I believe on sale.  I have shared my enthusiasm and passion about cucumbers.  But I was ready to throw them as they weren't ideal.  We didn't eat them in the best time frame.  Corey asked if we could salvage them and make a quick salad with the good parts.  I shook my head felt the produce and said I don't think there is much to save but we can try.  Yeah one and half inches is all that we didn't use.  As the blemish was quite a hole.  Otherwise by making a quick cucumber salad we had an easy and tasty side for dinner with our delicious cod and turnip greens (new post tomorrow about the greens :)    And I am proud of myself for using apples with bruises as a snack for today without a second motivation speech from my dear husband. 

It's easy to hold onto old values and teachings.  But its no secret that our world, especially our country is not doing too well.  Our old ways are quite destructive so slowly we need to work together to establish new protocols that benefit us all.  Let's scale back on our waste so that we have more to share with our neighbors. 

May your HealthFULL Journey open your eyes and hearts to new viewpoints and causes that matter and that will in turn mold you into a better version of yourself. 'Til we meet again. . .