Oh if my life was a movie this week... cue into the closing scene where a woman walks down the sidewalk in front of her office building with a bounce in her step and a giggle on her lips. Now if this truly was a movie the woman would be 5' 11" just over a hundred pounds in a gorgeous trench coat- fantastic make-up and perfectly coiffed hair possibly a french twist, mega watt smile with a confident stride and the background a slight sprinkle of rain with a touch of sunlight. But before we go into the fade back let's really examine the final scene. Because this blog isn't a movie but about my real HealthFULL journey on how I can Fully Understand Life by Living which means there are lots of these moments. Here is the true final scene: A heavy set woman, no make-up, a quick ponytail, an awkward pace to her gait, and a giggle bordering between hysteria or tears, with an open broken umbrella and a gloomy gray sky with spurts of wind. Now the choices that lead into this scene.
Its Monday because this is real life and real life seems to come together harshly this particular time of the week. We are approaching wintertime here in the South and instead of facing a harsh blizzard we tend to see a lot of drizzly depressing rainy days. This would be one of those days. I hate driving the truck in rain. The accelerator tends to stick when it gets a little chilly and the automatic truck pretends it is a bucking bronco. Not fun! But as I pull into our parking lot - wait for it I actually have an umbrella on me. This is news because for seven years of our marriage - my husband and I did not own a single umbrella. But I now own one that matches my purse. Fancy I know! My hubby calls it my little umbrella and I love it...or I did, but I am getting ahead of myself.
Work begins and time passes. The minutes tick down and the clock is nearing break time. Oh I so have the Monday blahs. Its cold out and rainy. No walk I pout, stomp, and whine I don't wanna. But don't want to do something doesn't mean I can't. That I am physically unable. And I realized that as an adult I can't give into my teenage rebellion or even my child-like tantrum just because I don't feel it. Sometimes we have to weigh our wants vs. our goals vs. our needs. I didn't want to walk but after my high blood sugar reading (the highest I have had in over a month) I needed to walk and that my goal is to lead a healthier lifestyle. Well grab the umbrella because we are going for a walk : sunshine, rain, or snow pull on the tennis shoes we're hitting the pavement. Did I have other options then walking outside? Absolutely! I could have walked the steps in our five story building (they are bit daunting and creepy). I also could have stretched in my cubicle for fifteen minutes but who wants to create that kind of scene. No I'll take my cute little umbrella and walk.
It felt good the first break. There is something about the smell of rain that is energizing as everything is refreshed. The confidence building as I did something good for myself and I didn't even want to do it. But I dug deep and accomplished my goal. Its that first step willing to embrace the activity, isn't it. I convinced myself go outside. If you only walk once around the building so be it. But my body craved movement and once the first step happened it was easier to follow it with 1500 more. Great first break.
The day continues on and the afternoon break looms before me. I silently debate my options. I already had fifteen minutes under my belt. Do I really have to commit another fifteen in the rain? Yes because I knew I was working late, when I get home I will be exhausted and on mommy/wife time. So if I wanted to get my full thirty minutes in for the day this would most likely be my last shot. Plus it really was refreshing the first break. Grab my tennis shoes and adorable umbrella one more time. Hmm...the grayness seems a little darker. The wind has picked up a little speed and an extra chill as I sink a little deeper into my coat. One time around the building done. I am feeling a shot of pride, a bounce in my step as my confidence grows and as I am too busy applauding myself a lot happens. I notice the wind is picking up my umbrella and flinging it around. I see one of the spokes has bent and then one final gust pulls the umbrella out of my hand as I simultaneously trip over the sidewalk. (The same sidewalk that I have walked numerous times all of a sudden has a crack that raises three inches off the ground just enough for my shoe to catch it and stub my toe). I lose the umbrella to the ground as I stumble three steps forward bracing myself for the inevitable fall and side step my umbrella (I don't want to break it) and the wind carries my friend away into the street into upcoming traffic as I twirl to catch both my balance and in a half-hearted attempt to catch my little umbrella. I watch in horror as a SUV comes racing down (or driving normal speed) bee-line towards my umbrella and I wondered if there was any possible way my umbrella could be spared and if not; Can an open umbrella hurt a moving SUV? There was something child-like as I wanted to race into the street and save my priced possession like a child does their ball. But miracles of miracles the umbrella is spared. I grab the umbrella and race to safety. As I turn the final corner towards my office building. It was like I was not only in a movie but a cartoon as I look up into my umbrella. As I gaze upwards one spoke (not the bent one) drops into two pieces. I try to close the umbrella to see the damage and there is one side that sticks out now with the two pieced spoke and the bent spoke and I do the only thing that seems natural. I giggle at my blessed misfortune. Yes I tripped. I lost my umbrella. And my umbrella broke. But I walked for thirty minutes. I actually had a working umbrella for 28 of those minutes. My umbrella did not get run over (and I didn't have to pay for any damage towards an expensive looking SUV). And though I tripped, I didn't fall nor sustain any true injury. Well a little bruise to the pride as I was beginning to think I was all that and a bag of chips. But a near fall and a broken umbrella bring me back to reality. So Broken Umbrella thank you for the memories, the lessons, and the humility.
May your HealthFULL Journey be full of opportunities that lift you up and catch you when you fall. 'Til we meet again. . .
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