Bopping around to a true eighties classic. Can you hear that expression and not think of the song? No It is impossible.
So, I did it. I bit the bullet, swallowed my pride, and actually followed up with a doctor. And had *cue horror music* a physical. I believe it has been close to two decades since I have had one. And since then I have became an anxious patient with not so good memories of doctor visits.
There was a little slapstick comedy as I tried to arrange this appointment. I called Monday (as my ER visit was last Friday). I had several criteria I used to narrow my search as I looked for my own doctor. I sadly have never had a personal doctor(besides my team for the baby) I never a doctor just for me, Suzy and surely as mom to be Suzy I had zillions it felt like but never a referring physician since I was eighteen. And I am thirty-one. Oh I have piggy-backed off of family and friend choices and recommendations but nothing "committed". Here was my narrowing down (the ER had recommended a branch but that was because they were on-call the night I stopped by the ER so I decided to take matters into my own hands.) I wanted someone who carried my insurance (I know I am thinking so adult like trying to save thousands of dollars), next I chose proximity (Location! Location! Location!), and finally I wanted and you can call this profiling or prejudice but I decided I wanted a woman to share this journey. I am a mom, we are going to be discussing weight extensively and I have a lot of factors that tie back to pregnancy, I want that womanly connection. It brought me down to one choice. Excellent - I then pick up the phone to call and got nervous. How do I approach this? What do I say? Do I act non chalant or matter of fact - lets get down to business approach? It really did feel like I was calling to set up a date. And the response to my call did not ease my anxiety:
Me: Hi! My name is Suzy and I went to the E.R. last Friday and they recommended that I follow up with my physician but I don't have one and I would like to make Dr. X my doctor. (in one breath)
Response: Let me understand. You want to become a new patient for Dr. X?
Me: Yes! Yes I would.
Response: Okay I will just need to get some information to share with Dr. X and see if she would like to take you on as a new patient.
Me: Okay (but in my head thinking, really? Like what kind of information - is this like a dating profile and if you don't like my answers you are booked up. And what kind of patients does the doctor want? Someone with a lot of ailments that they can write articles and be challenged by or someone who just needs to list a doctor and might be in once a year?)
Response: (asked the basics) and then the essay question portion : for what do you want to see the doctor?
Me: Diabetes
Response: Any other medical problems?
Me: I am morbidly obese. (wow did I just say that? Its true and when I show up in the office if my rose is accepted - I know! I know! Too much reality tv - they'll see for themselves. But I don't know if I have ever been that honest out loud with another person. )
Response: Okay well that should cover everything and someone will let you know soon if you have been accepted and if accepted to schedule your new patient physical. (Feeling awesome - let my walls down and now I just wait for acceptance or rejection and if accepted my prize is a physical - GO ME!).
Well Tuesday arrives and I see I have a voicemail at 11:45 am. The office called at 10:10 to schedule me this afternoon at 1:30. WOW! (My answers must have been stellar for such quick reply ;) I arrange it with my boss to take off for the appointment call them back to accept their appointment. And they had given away my spot. So I was accepted, I then called to reconfirm my acceptance and then I was rejected but scheduled for a slot in mid-December. Hmmm. Okay - that is a lot to process. Go back to my boss false alarm I'll just continue to do my work - heh heh. Phone rings at 1:54 pm (I am not making this up) to come into the office for a 2:30pm appointment today. Oh well that's great except I am at work and it is a 25 minute drive and I have to go back to my boss after my workload has tripled to request leaving within ten minutes of my request. I am just on fire!!! But in the back of my head I hear or take your December appointment. My boss agrees and I try to tidy up my desk as quickly as possible and fly out the door. I arrive to fill out 8 pages of paperwork - this office is thorough! And onward through the physical. It was confirmed that I am diabetic. (Horrible A1C - but the next one will not only be better but awesome!) and they weren't loving my blood pressure (I think for the exchanges we had in 24 hours I was pretty even keel).
Not a fan of doctors. Certainly not a fan of medications. but I have tried this on my own and it is time to make room in this HealthFULL Journey for those with medical degrees. How can one succeed if one never tries? I am gonna give it the old heave ho and we'll see. This road has had some bumps, mountains, valleys, but not an experience I would have missed. So I keep traveling, with an open heart, open ears, open eyes, open mind, and hopefully a little wisdom for those moments that require a decision.
May your HealthFULL Journey allow you new experiences, wisdom in all circumstances, and peace for all your choices. 'Til we meet again. . .
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