Mental Cobwebs

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10

Whooooooooooooooooooooooooosh!
That it is me blowing out the tension.  This week I have screamed, cried, giggled, yelled, collapsed, growled, clapped, strained, and made apologies, many apologies in reaction to the events.  I have just been off beat. Everytime I try to alter my steps or seek a new rhythm I get lost.  And I mean lost!!! I have to drive a mini bus for my job.  I am not one to brag about my driving and I obviously have commented on my navigation skills.  But this week I truly outdid myself.  I was on time for work. Which would narrow it down to Tuesday since every other day I was not :(  (Seriously this has just been beyond a crazy week!!!)  I get in the bus check my mileage make sure it is in good condition and am off to my first pick-up.  Wait! There is an orange light on the dash - not good! So I make a quick call back to my employment and they say to keep driving.  All right! Good to go - pick up the kids, next stop successful as well.  Missing one kid - early dismissal excellent back to work I go - smooth easy - like I've done it before.  The kids get a little rowdy.  I have a pow wow with almost half the bus about rules and the reason we have rules is for everyone's safety - awesome! Back on the road for the final school.  Which is literally a block away from the second stop.  I know my way I am good to go!  I take the curve and realize I am in big trouble.  The bus and I are now in the car lanes.  Slow motion shake of the head and a yelp of frustration and for good measure hit the steering wheel with the palm of my hand because I am literally stuck.  Oh sure there is a middle lane created for those who dare to drive this street between 3 and 4.  As two lanes are lined up going the same way against both curbs.  But the middle lane is barely wide enough for a family sedan.  And I mean barely as I watched a car meander for five minutes down the block through all of the awaiting vehicles.  Nowhere enough room for my mini bus/oversized van to squeak through without extensive damage to numerous vehicles.  So I wait - because there wasn't much choice.  Ten minutes tick by - another ten minutes tick -school is officially done for the day.  Five more minutes pass and there comes the swarm of middle schoolers.  I had a horrific thought that I had to wait to bypass the lane until the 13 cars in front of me and the 14 cars beside me matched up with their riders. (Yes I did count - I certainly had enough time :)  But slowly after the second swarm of teenagers ascend cars begin to crawl.  Each taking a turn - another seven minutes pass - and FREEDOM !!! I am able to drive the extra 100 feet to the bus lane which is accesible from the other end of the street!  And look no buses because they have came, picked up the kids, and been on their merry way for at least ten minutes.  I still somehow manage to park in the wrong spot but as the normal traffic is gone I am excused.  However I have to wait because the kids had been notified that their bus was stuck in car traffic - because yes a bus in the car lanes makes quite a sight of what is wrong with this picture.  So four of my kids arrive breathless as they had run the distance from the original pick up location to the car lanes and back.  However, they forgot to tell the fifth classmate - the bus had ended up back in the bus pick up lane.  So down to three kids as one volunteers to grab the classmate. Who won't believe his classmate and takes his time following.  Alright five kids - as I mentioned I am only a block away from my second stop which I found my employment quite easily.  But being frazzled from our waiting I blow right past the correct street to turn.  And I begin my scenic journey.  Several youth question where we are going and I chuckle after my apologies for their wait and confusion.  I think I can pull out of my confusion and forge the path for the bus back to work.   No go after seven minutes.  I admit defeat and turn around to retrace my route.  Seriously one of the kids question where are we going and again I offer my apologies and that we are indeed headed back.  Then I park the bus after our not so fun nor scenic route.  The bus continues to buzz and squeal at me as I remove the keys.  There is a little button I sort of knew about but not enough to figure out without two other faculties assistance.  Stellar - Tuesday and I have been lost twice.  That's right I was late to work Monday because I got lost from my house to work.  I had taken the wrong exit and like a hiker lost in the woods I kept during circles around a complicated intersection. 

Wednesday was a no go for work - As obligations piled up and then my son fell down some steps literally as we are about to leave the house.  He is okay, we consulted with medical professionals and were given instructions what we should keep under keen observation.  Then Thursday I had psychological/personality tests to endure.  I answered 567 True False statements about myself - then 240 questions with 5 levels of strongly agree to strongly disagree also about myself and then some vocabulary and logic questions.  Great! Plus a four hour round trip drive and still go to work -  = A round of awesomeness but get this I didn't get lost.  I apparently only do that within a 20 mile radiues of where I live.   My husband and I are trying to work out more with a regular schedule in hopes of actually working out.  Usually we meet at the gym Thursday but with my mind spinning and our son not sleeping before nine most nights we figure a little family walk around our neighborhood would be suffice.  Of course we had a million tiny tasks to do after I was about thirty minutes late from work. Dinner wasn't ready as my husband had several calls to handle and that is kind of the pace this entire week.  And then Friday was its own special day with different hiccups. 

But after hearing the bit you did - can you understand why I want to get rid of these mental cobwebs?  Yes we did go out of town last week and had a wonderful time as family at the beach with some friends.  But this week I have felt behind the eight ball every moment of every day.  Hopefully , this weekend I can have some quiet time with my cute little boy, get some things organized so that I am not doing the fifty yard dash with hurdles daily, and rearrange priorities.  Because there is a hierarchy of what really matters at the end of the day.  Its not fair to tell everyone and everything they are number one and then they fall almost everyday to sixth, seventh place.  They feel bad, I usually feel worse and no one is feeling like the superstar!  We almost passed on our family walk Thursday night - it was dark, we were grouchy, and overwhelmed and yet we agreed that even a simple four block jaunt would do us a world of good.  It would clear that mental cobweb stubbornly gripping our health and time and stealing joy from us.  It did help - we talked, we moved, and we accomplished far more in that fifteen minutes than what our to do list would show.

If you are having mental cobwebs - I completely understand - we can trade stories anytime :)  If you feel it is too much work or overwhelmed - take that ten minute walk or twenty minute nap - or half day of fun with those you love.  Because trudging through life is no way to live and the cobwebs will still be able to cling.   

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10

When you live your HealthFULL Journey and come across those days that seem rough, overwhelming, or just plain not fun - may you on those days stir in a giggle, an opportunity to get creative, or serve as a wake up call.  God called us to live with enthusiasm and burn as a light for HIM not to suffocate under the overwhelming tasks of the daily grind and allow the mental cobwebs to pull us down.  Destroy those cobwebs by living in the glory of GOD. 'Til we meet again. . .

Causing quite a Racquet!

causing quite a racquet!
 

Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom,
and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too,
is a chasing after the wind. - Ecclesiastes 1:17


Thwap! Boom! Swoosh! *Grunt* *Yelp* Ahhhhhhhh!

Yes these are the sounds you would have heard as I competed on the racquetball court with my hubby Cor on Monday night.  These are also the sounds that have taken residence in our lives.  To say we have been busy this past month is a laughable quote.  Time, energy, tears, tearing of hair have been spent in abundance.  Working at a new job, getting glasses for the toddler, taking our beach vacation, teaching Sunday School, and scheduling appointments - lots and lots of appointments are some of the highlights of why I have been so quiet about this HealthFULL Journey.  There has been lots to say with little time to share. 

With our hectic schedules you can see why I feel like I am chasing the wind.  I feel I have the grasp of a situation or have captured a moment of wisdom and then it slides right through my fingers and I am left holding - NOTHING!  It is a frustrating pursuit, but I continue on this path because that moment of capture - that split second where you feel you have reached the treasured goal - your heart bursts with pride, your lips curve in a smile, and that glow of satisfaction starts to wash over you.  Only starts to cover you because in that next second you have lost that moment and again begin to desperately chase the opportunity that was just within your grasp.

My life this past month has felt like a game of racquetball.  And not just any game of racquetball but the heated match between Corey and myself 9/24/12.  My husband greeted me after work after we both were running thirty minutes late (which equals out the thirty minutes I was late to work - shocker I got lost!!!)  We stopped by the front desk to request a court to begin our battle and also the equipment.  You can see we are hard-core athletes when it comes to this fast-paced game.  It had been about a decade since either of us had played - but that didn't stop us from our pursuit to battle to the death - or until our twenty five minutes were done as both courts were already scheduled for that time. 

We entered the court, gripped our racquets, and securely placed our protective eyegear.  My husband gets ready to serve that little rubber ball of speed and force.  Oh timeout!  My glasses are fogging up.  A phenomenon I know well as I began wearing glasses at age five in Northern Minnesota.  My gracious husband switched goggles as he had not had any trouble with his pair.  Double drat these fogged up on me too.  We haven't even started playing and I can't see.  I feel these protective eyewear are not going to help me avoid danger as much as place me directly in the path of the lightning quick ammunition as a suitable target.  Again a perfect way to describe how some of these past weeks have felt.  What should protect and help me in my journey has served as direct missiles and choosing me as the perfect target for crazy explosion.  But back to the game.

We begin to play and I learn to peer through the fogginess (my curse of a short button nose!) or where I one hand my racquet and lift my glasses for a quick reprieve of every three seconds.  The game of racquetball is full of interesting and may I add "comical" noises.  I believe this is where comic book writers are inspired for their noises describing their combat sequences.  "Thwap!" "Boom!" *Whistling Missile* "Pow!" "Grrr!" "Ow!"   The last Ow that might just be me as that little blue bomb hits me in the shoulder. 

The great thing about racquetball is that you can hit the ball in any direction - Sides, back wall, front wall, floor, and ceiling count  . . . well at least in the version we played.  But I believe everyone else allows for the sides, back, and front wall.  The object of the game is to reach fifteen points.  You are allowed only one bounce before that satisfying smack sends the ball ricocheting around the room closely resembling a padded cell (without the padding) in an insane asylum. Even the door looks impossible to open from the inside as the "knob" nestles inside the door as to avoid injury in your quick pursuit to hit that little bouncing wonder. 

Usually, the game is played with two opponents facing off against each other in hopes of one winning.  We played a version more like the ball and walls/room were on one team and that my hubby and I were on another.  I tended to lob the ball against the wall after a double, triple, or quadruple bounce and then prayerfully cower as my husband would smash the daylights out of that little blue trajectile zooms leeringly at my head. 

Did I mention that I had a lot of fun?  Oh sure I am not ready for the olympics nor a real opponent but there is something satisfying about chasing down a specific target and then smacking it to smithereens watch it careen through the air and ricocheting off the ceiling and walls with intense but hilarious sound effects. 

Like I mentioned before this game mimics a lot of what is going on in our daily lives.  There is a lot of pursuit in our lives - being impressive at work, being available for our families,  seeking out opportunities to serve at church and in the community, while still trying to better our future opportunities by chasing them down.  We pray for moments where we can be a smashing success, make a little noise, and then walk away knowing we left everything on the court.  But we need to be wise in our pursuits because nothing is more frustrating than chasing the wind.  We think we are following God's will, we feel proud as we continue our noble pursuit, and then as we near the finish line we realized it was a mere illusion as the target appears to move further away always just inches beyond our grasp.

May your HealthFULL Journey lead you to pursue noble dreams and satisfying goals. But if you do find those moments you are chasing the wind may they be filled with humor, loving support, and nuggets of wisdom. 'Til we meet again. . .  

You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!!

   

courtesy of www.tagweed.com

 

 

“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, ...

 ---Matthew 25:31-46 ESV  

 

Last week was a week where you just hope to survive.  Rules are good but not dealbreakers.  Healthy eating probably not going to happen.  Clean house - a nice dream.  Happy home - sounds good on paper.  But those transition weeks are just overwhelming.  I ended my dream nanny job Tuesday and began my new job Thursday with a dr. appointment in between.  And I was worried that
I was going to be without a job for a l-o-o-o-o-o-o-ng period of time - pffft!  Funny how we worry about things that never come to light.  Then we complain about the things that we hoped would happen - at least that seems to be a common pattern of my life. 

Which also meant last week was a new childcare routine.  Oh the things I took for granted in life before being a mom - long showers, hot meals, quiet, and schedules.  Oh the nightmare of scheduling appointments, childcare, even spontaneous moments of fun need to be scheduled or they just don't happen :)  What was new about this childcare routine?  Besides church where I am actually in the building - I was leaving my baby with a care provider not directly related to me:(  For almost the first 22 months of life ( minus NICU and nursery) my son has been supervised by myself, hubby, or grandmas.  Oh how would we have survived without the grandmas I can't imagine!  But we needed to make a few changes with my new work schedule and that meant enlisting the help of a dear friend who is a fabulous mommy and my numero Uno pick if it couldn't be family. 

This meant a new location.  I have been to my friend's house several times, I had my GPS and texted directions and I still got lost.  I'm talking way lost!  I argued with the GPS - I closed out my texted instructions and I clung to bits of my memory to string together a path to their house.  Directions aren't my thing - but with an almost two year old in the car and the minutes ticking closer to my second day of work I had to pull it together and figure out a solution.  I decided to turn around and start from scratch.  And that's when I saw them.  It was one of those sights that you blink your eyes to see if you are so stressed that you are hallucinating.  Nope - definitely real.  I saw a pack of goats.  Not one not two.  But at least 20 goats skipping along merrily in someone's yard.  Not a farm but someone's yard.  And I'm thinking to myself - how lost am I that I am seeing goats? 

Oh it had been a week of highs and lows and just feeling completely overwhelmed.  Last Tuesday I stood there crying in my brother's office as I no longer would be a nanny for my fabulous nieces and nephews.  He is Mr. Sensitive when it comes to me and questions "Why are you crying - you are going to see them again - you're their aunt."  I know, but its different.  I won't hear the daily thoughts.  I won't hear about their crazy dreams at breakfast or why their moods changed or that their favorite color changed three times within a day.  On paper it might sound a bit strange or even the tiniest bit boring - but it is these little conversations that were like precious gems of our time together.  And my bidding them good-bye as they began school I was losing a job of comfort - being aware of the expectations, familiar surroundings and knowing for the most part the kids and their temperaments.  For I knew within two days new job with a clean slate - new environment, different kids, and piecing together what is expected.  It's challenging.  Somewhat taxing. And Extremely Overwhelming. 

There are new routines, new directions, and new expectations to be established and conveyed.  Working forty hour weeks was a new challenge and some of the housekeeping and organization duties went away for the summer.  This omission added to the chaos that led to my wandering of streets and stumbling upon the goats.  So after Friday it was time to establish a better foundation one that is strong and organized - not weak and cluttered from schedules, to household, to care of my family it was time to start.  I chose the pantry - I am going to disclose a picture - it is the START of clearing my pantry and my opportunity to establish order in what began to feel like an overwhelming ocean of chaos. 

You may be thinking "You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!! " But this is truly 3/4 of my pantry!

 

It was time to reclaim my sanity and that meant start organizing my home once again.   You may see duplicate products.  We are running all the time to the grocery store forgetting lists and not knowing was was hidden in the pantry.  I took inventory of our freezer that is packed to full capacity - almost in need of a sign - "Open door at own risk!"  Insane!  Is the pantry all that needed an overhaul? No!  But it was striking a nail and helping me to reclaim my peace of mind with each pound of the hammer.    It took goats for me to see that I was lost but with a little help, a little time, and a little extra concentration I am going to forge my new path.  It's time to say farewell to chaos and reclaim my peace of mind.

 

May your HealthFULL Journey include peace of mind with little clutter to overwhelm you so that you too don't have to utter " You've Goat to be "kid"ding me!!! " 'Til we meet again. . .

 

Fully Dressed with a Smile

Two of my biggest blessings to smile about :)

" For the Mighty One has done great things for me ---holy is his name." ---Luke 1:49 NIV

Life is awesome right now! I am floating on Cloud 9 and can't stop SMILING!!!  In the last week I have had three separate compliments on my appearance - that I look good.  And my first thought is I haven't lost weight according to my scale or clothes.  So what's really different?  Then the lightbulb clicked and I realized I smile these days.  Also if I am being completely honest, I swagger (not wiggle and jiggle which is what happens when I lack confidence and forget to dress with a smile :)  I actually have confidence back because I have a goal - a purpose.  I can move full speed ahead because I am aware of my direction.  Can my journey throw me a surprise curve? Absolutely!  But at least having a goal leads to a path with a true direction instead of wandering aimlessly in circles throwing up my hands and shrugging - I don't know where I'm going or which direction to go.  Should I keep walking? Sit down? Give up? Cry?  Because on this HealthFULL Journey I have absolutely done that list. 



This is me preparing dinner - Braised Short Ribs

So why am I smiling?  Because this is the year I am going to truly lose this excess of 100+ pounds!  How do I know?  Three secrets - I'm claiming my life -meaning I am a true active participant in my decisions, my actions, and my results.  Some may think - aren't we all active in our own lives? The answer is No!  And I know this because I wasn't. I let others make my choices - little things like what do I want for lunch, what show do I want to watch, or what words are appropriate to say.  I don't want to hurt or offend anyone and that means Suzy's opinions get brushed under the rug due to my perception of others.  That's right my perception.  Which is not 100% accurate.  Which means I say or do not say certain opinions because I fear offending or hurting someone else's feelings without KNOWING if it will.  I am a pretty easy-going person - somewhat adaptable.  Most restaurants or meals I can figure out a solution to find something I enjoy or prefer eating and the same with television or movies or can suffer through an episode or two.  But there is a point of being easy-going and totally disappearing into the background as others live their lives around me and I just sit back and live theirs.  Nobody wants that.  How am I staking claim in my own life?  I am choosing my schedule for the most part. Obviously I discuss things with my husband as we are part of a pretty fabulous family unit.  But I am voicing things I think are important - like finding time to work out and a place that will hold me accountable (discuss this more in a moment :)  And I am cooking more for the family.  I am aware of the kitchen and how to actually cook foods and not just heat up a frozen pizza.  I need a little extra time to get organized and build some true cooking knowledge.  I am a beginner and I want to work towards champion status or at least a worthwhile competitor instead of a whiny ignorant novice that freaks out at the sight of the big box like appliance with knobs that spews heat with some hot rings on top.  (Or what most would call an oven/stove :) 

Next secret - getting organized!  See how I actually have the ingredients on the cupboard?  This is a new step for me.  I like to grab random bottles and then stash them away.  Before the meal is cooking our kitchen tends to look like a war zone and no one knows how to help me including myself because the scene is so overwhelming there seems to be no actual step that will make a true impact.  It would make a seasoned chef weep and raise hands in despair.  Also the next picture shows keys in a dishwasher.  You may also notice tiny fingers helping Mommy in that picture.  I have a twenty-one month old toddler quickly on the move.  I want the areas he plays or explores may be a better word to be safe and clean.  He also has started a fun game of let's hide things in random places - Example - keys in the dishwasher.  Had I not seen this happen I am not sure how long I would have looked for these keys.  Alright so I'm claiming my life and making sure it runs smoothly with organization (or at least progresses in a somewhat forward motion ) what's the final secret?

I've got a plan/purpose which is easier to accomplish with organization and that I am engaged in my own life.   What's the plan?  I am working part-time because being home with my son at this precious age means too much to me right now.  Well than why work?  Because we have some bills that need paying and I want to truly lose this cumbersome shell of extra weight.  How does a job help - it occurs at a health facility that promotes christian values, healthy physical lifestyle while also engaging our minds.  I have no excuse to not work out when I am going to be there five times a week - talk about accountability and scheduling myself for success.  That's my immediate plan but I also have bigger purposes to work towards that a physically fit version of myself will have better chance of success.  I want to be a mom again.  Well not that I stopped being one but we would love more children or at least one more :)  Would our son have been born premature had I been more physically fit?  Possibly.  Would I have had an easier pregnancy?  Most likely.  If I can make the next time around easier on both myself and our future child I think we both deserve me at least trying to improve the odds for success of a healthy pregnancy and delivery.  Also, I have felt called to ordained ministry - it is a lengthy fully involved process that I will have a lot of questions to answer on that journey and several deal with my health from all standpoints.  It is pretty hard to answer affirmatively I am in the best possible health when I carry so much excess baggage on my physical frame.  I want to be able to stand up in front of anyone and say I truly live a healthy life and not feel like a fraud.    So how do I move forward with my three secrets?

We all need a little R & R

Great way to refuel with a healthy snack

I go and live my life.  This means finding time to focus on all aspects of my life and not to conveniently skip over the complicated areas.  We as a couple need to find time for dates and to enjoy friendships outside of our trio of a family. But to also spend quality time outdoors or at least outside of our home doors - even if that means walking around the neighborhood more often.  It means that leisure activities not just focus around the dinner table.  For example a zoo outing that encourages family bonding while still walking and no eating.  Crazy - but possible :)  Why look we actually did do that just last weekend. Don't the bear and koala both looked pretty pleased with life as well almost as if they're fully dressed with a smile.

So many blessings are waiting to crowd our daily lives.  Sometimes we just have to open our eyes and acknowledge them with a smile.  Blessings in my life these days are almost too high to count but I would still like to share a few - two cute guys that greet me with a smile every morning,  amazing friends and family, a close connection to God, okay finances, a new job (which was a wonderful answer to a heartfelt prayer), a true purpose with guidance, hope, and time - time to continue learning, loving, and serving such an awesome God.  So you see why it's a lot easier to smile these days.

May your HealthFULL (Feeling Unbelievable & Loving Life) Journey point you towards your purpose that utilizes your talents, awakens your passion, and give you reason to be Fully Dressed with a Smile.  'Til we meet again. . .

Spreading the good news

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others,

 faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. --- 1 Peter 4:10 NIV

My son has a joyful spirit.  He bumps his head and giggles.  He shrieks with delight when others laugh and play along.  And he smiles ....a LOT!  I wish I could take credit but this is his gift.  He loves life....he embraces the moment and without a word challenges you to laugh at the world too.  Drew teaches us to smile at what "now" can bring not what was or what will be but what right now can bring.  He does faces - he's learning to roll his eyes, muster a serious gaze, and show distress but still has a glint in the eye and tilt of the head to share a giggle after he is understood. He makes me want to do better.  To not miss an opportunity to graciously accept the blessings of today but to also seek those moments where I can share my gifts and hopefully add to the glory of God's kingdom. 

For three years I have been sharing on this blog my goal to get healthy. I started writing this in anticipation of the physical pounds just melting off my body.  Sure, I would write that its a journey and a process.  But in my hopes of hopes I thought within a year I would be sitting in my chair typing as my skinny version.  I did not know at that time that the weight I had been carrying wasn't all physical.  I toppled the scale with pounds of hurt, anger, resentment, grudges, disappointments, regrets, and worries - tons and tons of worries that not only piled on the pounds but bound them to my frame.  I had much work to complete, many life experiences to endure, and tons of challenges to conquer.  Many blessings have found our home and covered us in comforts, love, and much hope. Every area of my life has been touched, stretched, and improved in unmeasurable proportions.  But yet the weight remains an ugly picture to such a beautiful journey. 

So this weekend my hubby and I had one of those sincere heart to heart conversations where all the layers of politeness and untruths are left unraveled on the ground leaving only the purest, most sincere answers of honesty remained.  He dug and coached and pulled what I really hoped to accomplish this year.  And after many ----MANY resumes being sent to find that perfect job to replace the nanny job of mine with only five more days  left to work an e-mail requesting an interview found my inbox.  As of today I am re-employed with no days to celebrate my farewell to a summer I will always treasure as I embrace my new role as an afterschool counselor.  The best benefit besides the children I will meet and the work that will challenge me and allow me to share my gifts of education, entertainment, and encouragement I get a free gym membership. Not only do I get to share my faith but I get to be held accountable for my true goal of embracing my physical health.  It's time to get fit and trim.  God will use my strengths but even more impressive is that He will also build up my weakness.  One of my favorite verses is John 3:3 "He must become greater; I must become less."  It can be easy and its always fun to share our gifts and our strengths.  But sometimes the best thing we can do to prove God's awesome power is by showing our weakness and offering it to allow God the chance to display His greatness - for He is the Almighty.    

It was a special weekend for our family and I am blessed to have two amazing guys.  One to teach me the joys of life and one to challenge me to the purest desires of my heart so that I can be the best possible version of myself. 

May your HealthFULL Journey make you Feel Unbelievable & Love Life as you find joy in the here and now by being honest with yourself and sharing the gifts that only you can deliver. 'Til we meet again. . . 

Been Flyin' High

Jesus looked at themand said, "For mortals it is impossible, but not for God;

 for God all things are possible."  -Mark 10:27 NRSV



Flyin' High at Sky

Whoa!  It has been a week!!!  Full-time job and straight to the church to Fly High at SKY for our Vacation Bible School.  (The photo is our actual decorated Sanctuary as our Launchpad for Opening and Closing for every night!) 

I went back in time - sort of!  I revisited the memories of ten years right before I was married. The crazy schedules I kept - the energy and enthusiasm I had for life and how I would need to crash so that I could do it all again.  However, there are some differences. I have a fabulous hubby to vent which is more conveniently stashed in my house than a boyfriend halfway across the country or a state way (only a ten minute drive but a state boundary makes it sound more dramatic.)  I also have a much stronger alarm clock these days.  I remember the days of Snooze making a difference.  Now I peek at the Baby Alarm through one eye open with head on pillow and see if the scream level is at a 3 light or a 5 light on monitor.  3 might settle back into sweet snores.  A 5 red light means better hustle to my li'l one's room because we are ready to start the day.  A decade ago meant if I was home before midnight it was kind of an early night where these days I saw nine on my car's dashboard and I was hemming and hawing how late it got.

And the biggest difference I creak after a night of enthusiasm.  I used to work 3 jobs, perform in two different shows, carry on a long distant relationship, and still have time for friends while being active in church and still have energy to burn.  Ummm I was lucky if I could have a fifteen minute coherent conversation at night with my hubby without ooooh, owie, and uhhing through my painful creaks as my bones rattled and settled.  And I can't even describe the morning routine as I pulled myself to the shower in hopes that the water would moisten and in turn weaken the brittle pains.

And though this week was insane!!! Honestly, more than a tear or two was shed out of pure exhaustion. BUT I wouldn't trade it for the world.  Oh I missed tucking in my sweet boy and relaxing at night with amazing hubby.  *Breathes in deeply with great anticipation* *Sighing Exhale* I tapped into some precious memories and physically recalled my youth.  Forty minutes before VBS started I turned to my hubby with sheer terror "What have I agreed to?" I have been trying to nod with certainty, smile with confidence, and a playful giggle that I got this in the bag.  But with less than an hour to go I had horrible stage fright.  Do I remember how to corral kids in a fun entertaining way?  Can I actually perform with people around once again?  (I truly have became hermit-like in some ways and the thought of trying to entertain a crowd seemed foreign.)  My hubby looked me in the eye and calmly stated - "This isn't something people just forget - you can do this!"  Yup that is one of the many reasons I married this guy.  I am a roller coaster that brings excitement ( the fun and the challenges) and he is my carousel (smooth and steady and calming ;) And sure enough with one rough read of the hastily written script we were out onstage and .....it came back!

The skills, the talents, the experience, and the best part - THE THRILL!  Oh if you have ever performed and enjoyed it - you know what I am talking about.  That moment when the audience smiles because you delighted them - the chuckles as they decide to go for the ride - they're there because they see the sincerity in your choices.  It's like magic.....but even cooler - it was all God!  I used to perform and was good because I bled, sweated, and cried theatre.  But that passion faded as the years past and the skill wasn't practiced.  As I sat at my computer at work the abilities to interact with people, kids especially, drained away.  And then in an instant dose of VBS the Holy Spirit restored talents that I used to take for granted and for them being abandoned for so long came back with a flourish that only could be at God's Hand. One of the comments I received was a question that tugs at my heart - Did you do this in a past life?  I slowly nod even at the thought of that question.  Because it does feel a lifetime ago.  But it also still feels as amazing as it did then.

Anyone looking for a theatre instructor for elementary age kids? Or a permanent VBS leader year round? :)  No takers?  Well I'll find with God's help a purpose for this hodge podge of talents.

The above scripture I referenced is the the theme of the SKY VBS package which you can find more information at http://group.com/vbs/sky .  But it feels especially fitting to me as I remember this week.  My body was tired.  My emotions wrought of the woman I am today and the girl I was who had the confidence to utilize the skills needed.  My mental capacity overloaded as I switched from Mommy, Wifey, to Auntie Nanny to a VBS Music instructor.  And yet - with God's strength I received more compliments than I can recount and am truly humbled.  And compliments even for music of all things.  I remember in high school being assigned a solo in a musical and laughing out loud at the absurdity - I'm the girl who can't sing.  The director didn't laugh. And it hit me like a ton of bricks he was serious. . . and sixteen leaders I am actually teaching others the actions and music.  Life sure is funny - don't forget to laugh along the way :) 

So after my nightly three hour singing/dancing work out I am wondering what to do next week?  My nights sure are going to seem empty.  May your HealthFULL Journey make you Feel Unbelievable & Love Life with reminders of who you were and more importantly who you have grown to be.  Don't forget to laugh at life's jokes!  'Til we meet again. . .

It sure Ain't Easy, but it Sure is a lot of F-U-N!

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,

  according to His power that is at work within us, - Ephesians 3:20 NIV




What I Imagined. . .

What is. . .

I know why we aren't allowed to foresee our lives because we wouldn't take the necessary steps to move forward.  Are you familiar with The Dance by Garth Brooks?  The whole song is about how isn't it great life is left up to chance and choices and surprises then us handpicking our stories.  Why - because if we knew the endings we wouldn't take the beginning steps.  And without that first step because of fear of the ending we would miss too many stories, too many opportunities, too many lessons, and too many precious memories.  We are conditioned to avoid pain.  Do you believe me?  Think of the next time you have to endure something painful - handling paper after paper cut, a shot/vaccine, washing out a wound, touching something hot. How do we respond -  we flinch, we pull away, we hesitate - we react in ways that show caution and hopefully steps that will help us avoid further pain. 

Today was a rough day.  I have decided that torture is trying to put two babies to sleep simultaneously.  Parents of twins - I salute you!  Granted I took a misstep that I will avoid to lessen my chances of repeating this painful scenario.  I forgot my son's stuffed Lion.  It happens, right?  My husband and I are fortunate parents we have a pretty easy-going sweet child (so much more his daddy's son - I just benefit :)  Oh holy Toledo Batman!  This child went ballistic, hysterical, and drove me to tears.  For 46 minutes out of fifty - he screamed, he cried, he pitched the tantrum of tantrums today.  He is twenty months old and obviously does not believe he is capable of a nap without his best buddy!  What was even worse? The three year old was actually trying to "nap".  Usually her and I go toe to toe, but not today!  Today I was locked in the battle of wills - would a nap commence.  I sang, I rocked, I cuddled, I tightened hug, I cooed, I whispered, I giggled, I paced, and my son SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEAMED in my ear, near the quiet three year old.  I finally walked through the house as the other kids were on lock-down while we tried to create a peaceful, quiet, almost serene naptime area for the two youngest.  Sadly, the toddlers missed the memo.  Not one but two children asked why aren't the two youngest asleep yet.  Great question!  And I not had a obnoxious piercing scream destroying my hearing abilities I believe I could have answered more wisely or at least more patiently.  However I sputtered out with dripping sarcasm, "I Don't Know!"  Losing my mind!!!  We returned to the recliner to once again commence naptime.  The tantrum began, the screaming escalated into short breaths of hyperventilation and mutterings of a desperate prayer - breathing deepened, limbs relaxed, and utter exhaustion took hold of both children. 

It would be easy to run my victory lap - I did it - both toddlers are resting at the same time!!! Amazing right?  But it was God's abilities and my willingness to concede defeat.  In our weakness God shows His Glory.  I like to be the best.  I like to attain almost perfect scores and everything to be precise and if I am going to accomplish something I want to knock out a homerun the first time at bat.  Can we all hit a Hole-In-One?  Absolutely!  Can we do it our first time swinging the golf club? Doubtful, but possible.  Will we accomplish this goal every time we tee-off?  Nope.  Should we stop golfing altogether?  Not really. . .We miss those chances to be great because we don't want to risk the ending of failing of hitting rock-bottom. 

I worked for a good company before becoming a nanny.  They were beyond generous and supportive through my schooling, working a second job, and my pregnancy and the challenging beginning days of my son.  But I stayed too long at the office job that I was qualified to do but not passionate to improve.  It wasn't my calling and I knew that far before I handed in my resignation.  But it was comfortable and as I said a great place to work.  They took care of me.  But I began to suffocate and I leapt at the chance to be nanny.  Let me get this straight you want me to hang out and play games with five awesome kids where I can also bring my son to play.  Uhhh Yes please!  I imagined weekly trips to the library, daily adventures through our imagination, never skipping a devotion as we clamored together to share in God's Word.  Ummmm well we have done some of that.  I thought there would be lots of giggles and smiles and fun.  We sometimes laugh and have fun but there is a lot of the backstory I quickly edited from my plans - the bickering, the tantrums, the sulking, the pouting, the fights, the name-calling, the anger, the sadness, the - well you get the point.  It is downright taxing.  And its easy to get caught up in the frustrations - they tend to spurn each other. 

But then whats even better than my imagined version of gumdrops, lolli-pops and oozing sweet pictures of working with children bliss are those quiet moments.  The moment where my son curls into the lap of his oldest cousin.  The squeals of delight from their youngest as their middle child chases her with enthusiasm.  As the whole group deliberates and discusses the most strategic puzzle placement.  The boys reaching a peace treaty to play fairly. 

I wouldn't trade it.  Oh don't get me wrong if you had flashed the emotions and the daily energy withdrawals required by this job I would probably run for the hills.  But for every frustration, every drop of sweat, and every tear shed - I have at least five smiles and giggles upon giggles of what I've learned, witnessed, and been blessed by.  And this is all possible - because I admitted to God - though I was okay at the office job I was weak in passion.  He answered my prayer with a powerful response that maxed out my passion, my energy, and my talents and all he required a step of faith.  Its okay to take that first step without knowing the last - actually its better than okay its what we are supposed to do.  We are tempted to wait for those "perfect" moments but then we get caught waiting as precious blessings float right by.  Be encouraged!  A step of faith may not guarantee perfection but it sure is a lot of F-U-N!

May your HealthFULL Journey be adventurous, full of Faith, and surrounded by F-U-N. 'Til we meet again . . .    



Its not that Health is on the backburner. . .

Its just that there are so many hours in the days!

"So teach us to count our days that we may gain a wise heart." - Psalms 90:12

What do you think? Do we like the logo - or not?

I try! I can not emphasize this statement enough - I try!  I want to be a great mom. A good wife. An awesome Christian.  A wise entrepreneur.  A fun nanny. A sweet daughter. A bubbly friend. An inspirational blogger.  And some days I can hit one or even two of those titles.  But a majority of the time I feel overwhelmed, under-prepared, and pretty much a babbling crazy loon!  And that tends to be the good days :)  No its not that bad....all the time....just some of the time. Part of the problem is I have issues with real concepts vs imaginary ideals on paper concepts.  On paper I can budget to the penny or schedule every one of my "duties" and responsibilities with time to spare for "me" time.  However, in reality the baby doesn't wake up when I pencil in the start of his morning routine.  The traffic in real life never factors in my on paper schedule to be smooth going and no accidents!  And budgeting - let's just say I am using the ads of the 1980's and freak out every time I see a "real" price tag.  What? Bread costs more than a dollar?  A 2 liter bottle of pop costs more than seventy-five cents?  Stop this nonsense right now!    

So what happens?  I do the best I can - its all that any of us can do, right?  We plug along and try to accomplish what we can accomplish in a day.  I was ecstatic for this adventure to become a nanny.  It has blessed me every day - countless times a day - it also has exhausted my mental capabilities - my physical endurance (and this insane heat has not helped!) - and my emotional state swings like a pendulum from the extremes - but we push through, right?  We muddle, we smile, and we hope and pray.  In the free time I try to grow my idea into a business.  So far no takers at www.awriteword.org but I continue to putter around with advertising and the site.  *tweak* *chisel* Think, think, think . . . I send out resumes left and right and left and right.  As I look at the calendar and notice four weeks until my nanny gig is finished.  Its easy at the beginning of a journey or adventure to step out in faith and good spirits.  But as the calendar ticks by my nerves begin to twitch!  I know God has a plan and I can't wait to see what direction we go - but I'd be lying if I didn't say I was a tish nervous!!! 

We have lost the art of the truth in covering up our imperfections.  Oh no I am fine!  We've got plenty of time to finish that project! You look great!  I feel awesome - no these bags under my eyes are just a color palette trick I'm playing - you think they make me look tired - Not at all *yawn* and on an on we spin these tall tales, white lies, little fibs to push through our maniac schedules.  But in the end what is the point of the craziness?  Does my son feel less loved because he had frozen chicken tenders, again?  Did the world stop because I haven't blogged in over a week? You get the picture.  I don't mean to advocate we should all give up our responsibilities.  It is good to be organized and dependable.  But it is also important to acknowledge our human attributes and admit - I am not having a streak of perfection.  However, I can report I am doing the best I can.  I try to find sneaky ways to exercise (whatever you can knock out the earliest is so beneficial - it allows the rest of the day to be bonus :)  We continue to plan our meals - which is a lifesaver repeatedly.  This simple fifteen minutes of truly assessing your pantry bounty and scouring the sales ads two times a week - saves you money, time, and headaches/heartaches. 

I can state that although life feels crazy and my eyes begin to close earlier and earlier with less and less on my to do list crossed off - I am Feeling Unbelievable and Loving Life. 

May your HealthFULL Journey be a time to embrace your FULL health to create your best version of yourself so that you too can Feel Unbelievable and Love Life! 'Til we meet again. . .

Encouraging Words Dear Friends

 I know you're my friend, because we've laughed and we've cried - together!

No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends.  - John 15:13

Time moves quickly and life gets busy.  I think we all know that a little too well.  We count reading a FB status or a Tweet as staying in touch with loved ones.  A quick text is common to communicate family whereabouts.  And not seeing a person you live with for a day or two, is becoming a bit too common.  We forget how as humans we crave that comforting touch or harbor such a passionate desire to hear words of encouragement from those we cherish - and a text just doesn't satisfy those urgings.

I've learned I have a real problem with perfection-itis because I crave those pats on the head letting me know I'm a good girl!

Two days ago was my hubby's and my nine year anniversary.  It went semi-unnoticed from most people including us. We had some obligations and plan to have a grown-up date Saturday night.  Well one of those commitments was a church gathering.  Could we have missed? Sure!  Would people have minded all that much? Probably not.  But as I am cruising on a Health FULL (Feeling Unbelievable & Loving Life - Yep this acronym has changed for the better :) Journey; I have come to realize how important it is to keep real relationships with people past our immediate family that include true connections that extend past the computer or phone screens. And when we met with this group we had a task of creating a bookmark - a simple beautiful bookmark.  Let me correct that - It LOOKS simple.  Oh my perfectionist side came out and she is a bit intense and slightly bitter.  I for the life of me could not complete that task in what I felt was a timely manner.  And though we are trying to complete this project - I missed the true reason of the night - I missed the connection of friends -those moments where you share your happiness and your challenges. 

These last couple of days (and sort of weeks) have been a wonderful reminder of how friends can turn my frowns upside down. I would like to share a few :)

That Thursday night I received a call around 11:30 at night.  Who calls this late?  Those who matter who usually have something important to share.  It was a call from my oldest friend - I am 31 and our friendship has lasted almost twenty-seven years.  Its a call worth taking.  She has some things going on but that's not why she really called.  She just needed to chat.  She needed to shoot the breeze and escape from the intense moments suffocating her life.  She needed to hear that life was carrying on outside of their family's heartache.  A reminder that normalcy may one day return.  She needed that time and so did I.

Yesterday (Friday morning)  I went to work as a nanny.  Many mornings the kids come running out the door to greet me, especially if they know I am bringing my son.  But not a peep - not crazy because the morning was already looking a bit dreary.  I climb the steps to the house that appears semi-dark and open the door to a loud resounding perfectly group of five children shouting HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!  (For a moment I felt like I accidently ruined the surprise for someone's surprise party and realized the enthusiastic orchestrated moment was indeed for me - a day late which may be why it was such a SURPRISE, but still it was very touching :) 

Friday night I texted back and forth with a friend from middle school - We are months shy of hitting our 20 year friendship anniversary mark - wow the significance of my hubby's and my nine year seems to be dwindling quickly :) 

In our brief exchange we shared words about our relationship - triggered high school memories - and commented on the women we are today.  I'm not against texting as it may have sounded early in this blog - but this exchange was a bit sweeter and more current as I did just see her for the first time in three years just over a week ago.  We actually hugged, smiled, and our children played together all in the same room - it was fabulous!!! And a poignant reminder - its nice to have tons of FB friends to share the highlight reel of our lives - but nothing like a true friend with a REAL connection - that not only includes the highlight reel but the backstory, the outline that made this all come to be and the complete story with added commentary.

And dispersed among the stories shared I have received several messages that I wasn't quite expecting - aren't those sometimes the best words to hear/read?  When you see you have an e-mail or FB message there is a good chance you are expecting a reply from someone or the close circle of friends you expect to drop you a line.  But no I had not one but two messages from people that I have shared significant moments with but as friendships tend to do over time have faded.  It's nice to be remembered and encouraged.  I can't express what a blessing they were and how they both touched my heart  to read these words from these special people That's why I picked the opening scripture I did.  Yes sacrificing your life for another is the greatest gift but we only one of those that we can do.  I also like to read this scripture verse as a reminder - that we can daily lay our life down for others.  Would I have liked to go to bed instead of picking up the phone to chat. Possibly I was pretty tired - but my friend needed time and a listening ear - I've been in that spot.  When you already are feeling down and can't get someone on the phone doesn't that crush your spirit just a bit harder?  It does mine. Did the kids have to wish my a happy anniversary? No the day had passed but the extra effort and the sweet intention with such enthusiasm was more touching than a passing almost obligatory congrats.  Connecting with an old friend is always a gift.  But it took coordination, money, time, and lots of effort on both ends to arrange that long-overdue visit :)  And those extra words probably didn't take hours but mere minutes to send my way - but they will warm my heart for quite awhile. 

We forget the little things do matter.  Its okay to take shortcuts now and then (a text, an e-mail) but we as humans do need to lay down our lives - our "busyness" and take time for what really matters to truly share our lives, our time with those who matter.  Because it is in those moments we build, strengthen, and protect our relationships.

May your HealthFULL Journey be filled with heartwarming moments as you and those you love take time to lay down your lives for one another. 'Til we meet again. . . 



Gettin' Down to Business



http://www.clker.com/clipart-2225.html

And you show that you are a letter of Christ, prepared by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.  2 Corinthians 3:3

Life has been busy.  But if it wasn't busy - it wouldn't be life!  Crazy I know.  I'm lovin' life and truly exhausted but in the past week I thought hey lets add some extra fun which I really mean to translate to stress.  Yup stress!  I have decided to create my own business and see what that entails.  I am so excited to share with you my concept - please visit www.awriteword.org to get the full picture. Do you freak out at the thought of having to make a toast or you want to personalize your child's birthday invitations but don't know what to say?  Visit my site where we help you say what you mean with the rights for your special occasions.  There are a lot of how-to kind of sites.  But at my site we don't talk AT you - we collaborate WITH you!

Honestly, I am nervous of failure.  But I am tired of having regrets because too many times I have retreated at the mere thought of failure.  Oh my critic has been yelling non-stop for a week.  This can't work.  There will be too many hiccups.  What if no one hires you?  What if your site crashes? What if *Blah blah blah*!!! So often by the third downer debbie comment from my inner critic I shut down.  But not this time.  This time I seized the day and created a web site.  Was it easy? No.  Was it fun? Sometimes. . . Was it exhausting - A RESOUNDING YES!!! Would I do it again?  Absolutely!

I have learned quite a few lessons on the way in my first full week of starting a business.  My top five lessons or experiences of starting the website. 

#1 - Run the idea by some sane people.  When you are a dreamer like me you should check it with the family and friends you trust.  Sure you may here a critique here or there (and not always strictly limited to your concept.  When you ask for advice beware the gloves may come off and the words may begin to fly. You've been warned!) There is a lot to describe and design. You DON'T have to take every reply as the end-all of the whole project but a diverse crowd gives you a sampling of how the public may view this idea.  Honestly I thought there would be more protests or dreamer wisecracks.  But actually all of my friends and family have been incredibly supportive.  Shocking that those I consider close want to support me :)  I was expecting more protest but have heard a lot of encouragement.  "Interesting concept" - "Intriguing Idea" tend to be the top-runners of the comments.  It's like the world is going silent and people are grabbing their popcorn and drinks and getting comfy.  Will this or won't this idea work? As a hush falls over the crowd their are slight murmurs.  "I don't know if this idea will work but I would love to see the underdog survive to fight another day".  A few people may be ready to see the big fall - but I feel the love of so many others who are ready to applaud. 

#2 -  Since no one convinced me I was beyond crazy for trying this idea I went to www.godaddy.com and purchased a couple of website addresses.  My husband and I had talked about this possibility and there is no time like the present to start.  Then it was time to find a website designer.  I didn't want to pay for a design but then I remembered - I know VERY little about computers.  Enough to type and play games and read my e-mail.  This may surprise you but I d not speak computer code.  It didn't take long to realize that purchasing a web design wouldn't be all that bad of an idea.  I ended up www.Wix.com and www.intuit.com.  Both sites offered a free domain with differrent levels of participation.  Which would have been beneficial before I actually clicked on my first purchase to build this business.  Live and learn, right?

#3 - When you think you have said all you can on the website or that I have reached the elite status of finished through my templates design.  There's more - more to say, more to do, just more - a lot more.  There seems to always be a couple of loose ends to change to tie the whole system together or reach a resolution.  It may be my personal business and some might call me the boss. It tends to feel like the computer may be office manager who doesn't take any excuses or laziness.  So I describe the product, the process, my personal biography.  I flip through images repeatedly.  I lay out words and pictures and hope and pray it is worthwhile.  You begin to type in a zone Again wishing to complete this new adventure and go fishing - but I don't. . . at least not yet!

#4 - Keep the body fine-tuned.  Maybe the rule should read "You should keep the body fine-tuned".I have gotten back on diet soda - a lot!!!  Also chips have been doing the rounds.  And by rounds I mean mouth to mouth - to the hip And sleep - Next question!!! Even now my eyes drop close together in a burrowed brow.

#5 - Sink or Swim ?  It's not easy to say world give me your best shot because every attempt can be the move to stop the company. Or more likely the non-movement - without customers, without advertising - but without their input.  A Write Word.org could be an amaing success or a wild flop.  *Fingers crossed* for the former.  But at the end of the day I can rest my head on my pillow knowing I did all I could - Sink or Swim .  Let's hope for  a swim!

Like a fairytale

He has made everything beautiful in its time.
 He has also set eternity in the hearts of men;
yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginnng to end. 
Ecclesiastes 3:11

http://originalfreeclipart.blogspot.com/2010/08/fireflies.html

Dear Fireflies,

Tonight, I peered through my window
and saw dusk encroaching with a pinkish glow.
The night sky beckoned me
to step outside with a whisper from the tree.


I was enchanted by the colors and the fading light.
It was like the sun wouldn't go down without a fight!
And yet, as the colors fade;
among the fireflies a painting was made.


With the background of the pinkish purplish sky
the fluttering bugs were twinkling their good-byes.
The world seemed to pause at their will,
as all was hushed and very still.


All was still except for those dancing bugs.
There was a comfort within the scene echoed only by precious hugs.
So much in life taunts us that we most likely can and will fail,
but this fragile, delicate moment warmed the heart like an inspired fairytale.


This scene lasted a mere minute, or two.
And yet, it screamed a truth so true;
That beauty, kindness, and love continue to grow!
If we pause for just a moment, nature still offers a breathtaking show.

Bountiful fruit

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,

 faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  Against such things there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23

This verse of scripture literally sums up my first full week of being a "nanny".  The week was as amazing as I hoped and as exhausting as I feared, but most importantly I survived and am better for it.  We begin so many of our days with trepidation.  Will I have enough? Will I be enough? Do I want this enough?  We forget there is another side - that what we have will overflow - that we are more than we think - and that our want will only increase our love. 

I get to spend my days with six amazing youth ages ranging from twenty months - thirteen years of age.  We cover a lot of ground.  My mind, my body (so many aches ;), my heart, and my spirit are tested daily from so many directions.  Because each "child" (I believe we are all children) sees life from a different perspective and therefore has different needs I decided it was good to have a theme each day.  I also figured if I was to pull from any source to be our foundation, the Bible would be the best source.  This week and next we are diving into the fruits of the Spirit.  Each day  a "fruit" is the theme and we plan several activities around this.  And to make it even more diverse and fun I picked a fruit that I felt best represented the "fruits" of the Spirit to tie in the lesson and promote a lifestyle FULL of  Health for both myself and the kids who want to eat/live healthy (like many of us that at least say this is what they want :) 

What fruits would you pick for love? Joy? Peace? Patience? Kindness? 

I chose pineapple, melons (watermelon and canary), olives, pear, and oranges.  What I find a tad funny is the only fruit that I have not physically eaten this week?  Pears for patience.  I feel that it is pretty fitting :)  Also it was the one fruit that the kids all made faces and frowned afraid they would have to sample a bite.  Funny, how patience tends to be the toughest fruit to swallow.

Why my choices?  I picked pineapple for love because it makes me think of Hawaii that seems to have an image of pure bliss as it portrays a calm and loving environment that exudes utter relaxation.

Melons for joy because when I think of summer, fun, and family - we have shared many watermelons.  They are sweet, plentiful, and can get a little messy and everyone seems to have a smile after sampling a bite.

Peace using olives - olive branch anyone?

Patience with pears.  First I have to share my nerdy alliteration pleasure.  I like when beginning sounds play off of each other.  Next, I think it is easy for us to be the opposite of pears when it comes to patience.  We can start our day patient but as the day wanes so does our patience.  We need to be able to build our patience when we are at the point of having only a little bit.  Also a pear is ripe when it is.  It needs time and moves at its own pace and we as the consumer have to be . . .patient.

Last but not least orange for kindness.  I read somewhere that the color orange symbolizes friendship and kindness.  Also think about it - when you eat an orange it is one of the few fruits that once you start peeling lends itself to be easy to "share" kindness with a friend. 

This week has allowed me to sample many fruits - physically and spiritually.  Its amazing when we open ourselves to the world of possibilities - anything is possible and everything changes.

May your HealthFULL Journey include a large variety of fruit to sample- physically and spiritually so that our journeys can be as flavorful and as bountiful as possible. 'Til we meet again . . .

Hot Potato!

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. 

 For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 

-- 2 Corinthians 4:18

Isn't there something almost magical about farming? You plant these tiny little seeds, nurture that seed and it becomes a plant that with enough TLC learns to thrive.  Look closely at the picture above?  Do you see the bountiful harvest?  No?  Its potatoes.  A lot of potatoes! Enough potatoes to require the attention of three adults and five children.  Look closer at the picture.  How about now, can you see the potatoes now?  Probably not, but that doesn't make them any less real.

You don't simply pick potatoes - you have to dig for them.  Our top farmer would use the tractor to reveal the delicious vegetables hidden in plain view.  Then the kids and I would grab our baskets and begin to "play" in the dirt and capture our starchy treats.  And there were many potatoes to be found.  We sought, we dug, and we captured our bountiful harvest.

It was a moving experience.  The sun was shining and the as the soil was scattered - little jewels appeared ready to be harvested.  I have been like the potato which might prove the old saying true - You are what you eat :)  I have been waiting in the dark.  I have been growing.  I have sat silent avoiding early light afraid of a quick dismissal.  But with a few big upheavals ready to show myself and hope for the best. 

Pick me! Pick me! I shout to the world.  Pick me Pick me - the kids say to me daily for numerous reasons:  "Pick me to read!" "Pick me to say grace!" "Pick me to love!"  Isn't that what we all seek?  Pick me to love so that I can show my talents. Let me display all of my growing and that it matters to someone.  That someone cares enough to stop, even for a moment, and say wow I might not have seen it earlier but I see you are ready to be picked, utilized, and loved. 

What stage of growth are you experiencing? Are you just planted eagerly awaiting the future possibilities? Are you in the middle of a deep growth and fear disturbance?  Or are you ready to be harvested and screaming pick me pick me! 

It isn't easy to decipher which stage a seed recently planted may reside.  But with faith and  a tad touch of common sense; we can cross paths with the unseen and harvest the ripened "fruit". 

May your HealthFULL Journey include all areas of growth especially answers of  peace and  revelations of the seen and the unseen.  "til we meet again . . .

I told you there was a lot of potatoes ;)

    

Goodbye SweetHeart Goodbye!!!

Goodbye Sweetheart, Good-bye :)

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

 a time to be born, and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot, . . .

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance. . .

(Ecclesiastes 3:1-2,4)



How many celebrations have you attended?  Think, relish in these precious memories - weddings, birthdays, graduation parties, baby showers, celebrations for the any old odd reason - its a Tuesday, lost the last tooth, holiday gatherings).  Do you have an idea?  Are you laughing at the memories, the jokes that are retold still today about that occasion?  Now with those pictures in mind - how many sweets are present?  Be honest - no quick glances.  A lot right?  Pretty much every one of those memories has a cake battering (pun totally intended:) itself into those precious pictures.  Why? Because we want to make those memories sweet and special enough for those most delicious, outlandish, beautiful desserts.  Were these events about the cake?(I see some of you nodding - no these events were not about the cake!)  Would we have been disappointed as the host or the guest without that sweet treat?  Now you can nod. . .

We do like to celebrate with a sweet concoction to tie the event together.  We like the honoree to see we want to please all five senses - especially visual and taste.  We want this event to be filed under spectacular and fun and "sweet".  No one is grabbing the bitter melon to leave that nasty aftertaste of bitterness.  We want the event to end on a pleasing sweet note of aroma. 

I ponder this symbol of sweet gifts that we want to treat the occasion with a pile of sugar and to mark  that this day is worth the indulgence.  As I bid adieu to my co-workers of six years I picked up a few coffee cakes and orange juice and chocolate milk.  Even the healthy additions of fruit and milk are loaded with sweetness.  But why not? It was my last day and I wanted to thank them for being so "sweet" over the years.  This was a breakfast treat to say thanks.  They returned their gratitude with cupcakes.  Delicious, moist, mini  cakes topped with sugary mounds of frosting with even the selection of chocolate or vanilla.  Then just in case there wasn't enough sweetness a topping of swirly chocolate.  Remember first paragraph we want to especially delight the visual and taste senses.  I was touched my the gesture and of course showed my appreciation by diving in and even bringing a 1/2 dozen home.  (Don't worry these 1/2 dozen were shared with friends and when I say friends not just the me, myself, and I kind of friend :) 

Desserts are our go-to.  They say thanks and this moment is special.  They are easy to be made from scratch and even more simple to pick up from the store.  And say congratulations or farewell!  But another way to look at these sweet treats besides ahh sweet gesture wanting to treat me.  "Here is a pound to add to your frame as a reminder of us here."  And usually we respond through years of training - thanks for the extra pound I am going to carry this pound on my chest next to my heart :)  It is always nice to be remembered but maybe our indulgences for those special occasions have became a little too ordinary - and the occasional indulgence has become more of a daily excuse for excess.

I love the scripture that I opened with.  Ahh Ecclesiastes Chapter 3 you phrase life so eloquently - "there is a time to weep and a time to laugh".  Note how the scripture says that there is A time.  It doesn't say everytime or all the time we should laugh or weep.  Or in this blog eat every sugary treat offered.  Because you will be to many birthdays, many weddings, and many other "special" occasions.  It is okay to say no to the sweet treat offered.  It is okay to just cherish the memory without submerging yourself into the sugar induced coma.  I say all this to myself.  Because I like any excuse for indulgence.  It's "Janie's" birthday - happy birthday Janie pass the cake.  What its three o'clock Tuesday afternoon - where's the doughnut?  Happy Tuesday everyone!  You get the point? 

I loved that my co-workers took time and effort to say good-bye.  But the cupcake was gone within a minute.  The card that I had to read after work (My eyes might have started to water upon opening the card) will be cherished for a long while and the memories with my co-workers even longer. 

As the song goes:

Goodnight, sweetheart
Well,it's time to go
Goodnight, sweetheart
Well, it's time to go
I hate to leave you, but I really must say
Goodnight, sweetheart, goodnight

May your HealthFULL Journey include many special occasions worth celebrating and may you truly celebrate to your heart's content. Because there is a time indulge but also a time to abstain. 'Til we meet again. . .