*Pat on the back* Exercise has officially became an everyday habit and I am super excited and somewhat proud of the fact. I even added a little weight training today with Miss Jillian Michaels. I completed 22 minutes. And was pouring sweat (Sorry if that was TMI). I still had another three full circuits but I had reached my limit. Better to not overdo and risk injury.
*Pat on the belly* Eating healthy however has been going downhill since our trip. Slowly I let my watchful eye become drowsy, downright sleepy, and then squeezed shut. I like junk food. At least in the moment of weak resolve I think it is worth millions of dollars. But then I eat it and go "ehh" it was okay and hours later I am upset and feel quilty for stuffing my face with something I didn't enjoy, didn't really want, and most definitely didn't need. It's the hindsight of a bad love connection. In the moment you believe you are with the man of your dreams. And the next day you are embarassed to tell your friends that you went on a date and instead shrug your shoulders "ehh he's okay. . . as a friend." For awile I remember this about potato chips and pastries. But then I get a little overtired, a little overstressed, and a little down and the thoughts of greasy crunchy chips and sweet fatty pastries sound "nice". Well as this urge hit Friday (I tell you I need to skip this day all together) I craved doughnuts. And the reasons and excuses list for me was a mile long why I was justified and almost my duty to purchase and consume doughnuts until my heart's content. But it was as if the world said "You really don't want a doughnut nor do you need them after I creeped my car through rush hour traffic and pulled into the doughnut shop. I could taste the frosting on my tongue and the filling dripping down my chin. I love that creamy custard or sweet gloppy fruit topping (I am rereading the adjectives and with a full stomach am questioning myself, "Really this is what I crave?" But in the moment I confess, I do! I am all ready to place my order for a variety of tasty treats and in the doughnut shop there are maybe ten varieties and not filled donut. What?!?? I love doughnuts for their filling. And I could have just left. But did I? No! I knew that they didn't have any of the doughnuts that I truly enjoy and yet I still placed my order. Still brought them home and ate two immediately. One was okay and one was eh. But neither ricocheted me to utter bliss. Neither made my problems go away. And neither left me feeling like that was worth the trip, money, or extra calories. And yet I ate them. No one forced me but I still felt compelled to shovel them in my mouth. A part of me wants to keep this "indescretion" hidden and yet I know in my heart to move past these episodes. I must own these bad days and not blank them out. That's when I look in the mirror and go "whoa! How did this happen?" Well it happens when I eat two doughnuts that I didn't want. That's a good place to start. So if my exercise is holding steady it is time to tighten my belt (soon I hope!) if I can address better eating habits. I believe I found my foundation. Starting Wednesday I am beginning the 10 day sprinting journey to eat more "real" food. I came across this site today due to a friend liking it and began my own investigation at http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/ . She has a ten day challenge for people to sign up and all day I have had that nervous bubble in my stomach. That feeling, can I really do this? It makes me uncomfortable and nervous, but yet feel the conviction in my heart that this is the start I have been searching. I have to let go of my comfort foods that for the most part are just packages of chemicals and little to no nutrition. So after talking with my hubby we excitedly await to allow ourselves a little time to plan. Real food takes foresight to prepare. You can't just open the pantry, open a box, pour out contents maybe add water and cook. Buon Appetit, but not really because what are we really eating? Also I tend to follow instanteously without really weighing the pros and cons. So I tentatively step up to the plate and hope for a home run but would be ecstatic with my shaking knees not to strike out.
May your HealthFull Journey excite you in unexpected ways but that fill you with hope, peace, and joy. 'Til we meet again. . .
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