March for Babies One - by - One Hurrah!

Resting in the NICU

We marched as a family for our Early Bugs at this year's March for Babies this past Saturday.  Do you have flashbacks?  Those smells, those sounds, those pictures that in tv land make everything go swirly as you reattach to your past.  The memories flow from your heart to your brain and you've faded from the present world.  No longer do you hear the radio, the tv, or even the person sitting three feet away.  You are busy living in the past.  I bundled my memories of the NICU into a little present and rarely open the package.  Its overwhelming.  Maybe I am a tish scared, a bit angry, and yet overwhelmed with love and gratitude and feeling blessed. 

My sister-in-law made a fabulous t-shirt of my niece (born at 24 1/2 weeks and 1 lb. 6 oz) and my son (born at 29 weeks and 3 lb 11 oz.).  The t-shirt had them sitting next to each other at his baptism and then side by side a picture of each of them within the first few hours of their life which means they were in the NICU.  The sight of them side by side overloaded my heart as memories of their first days, weeks, months rushed through my thoughts.  So many emotions rocked through my body and the only release was tears. 

The NICU (neo-natal intensive care unit) is like another world.  You are buzzed into this semi lit huge room after scrubbing your arms down and as the doors shut all of the "world" problems - bills, politics, relationships, duties, chores, responsibilities tend to disappear.  There is no nice fade - out they just don't matter.  What matters is that tiny tiny person teaching all of us the importance, the challenge, the blessings, and the love that exists in that precious moment.  The beeps in the outside world that would drive me CRAZY with annoyance.  But here in the special world of the NICU - offer reassurance because they are telling us the answers all about our son to our questions that he can't ever answer.  Its a world where nurses tend to have one to two patients as there are so many needs to fill because the patients are so fragile.  And the best reward is when you are allowed to hold your child.  There are so many fears (germs, oxygen levels, blood pressure, pulse, weight, feeding, R.O.P. and the list rattles on forever) but when that permission is granted and you can just bond with your child as you dreamed of upon learning the news you were going to be a parent.  Your heart bursts and your body fills with warmth and the world goes quiet.  I never take a cuddle with my son for granted. 

He's doing amazing.  And his journey was less chaotic than so many of his roommates.  Its why we still support the March of Dimes as a family.  We know that the research is teaching us about ways to prevent prematurity and other birth defects and also to guide us to protect and provide for those that are born with a challenge.  I don't know what its like to leave the NICU and know your child won't see their nursery that you lovingly planned and set up.  But I pray for these parents who do. 

Our Early Bugs!!!

We walked as a family over 10000 steps (according to my pedometer).  We raised $625.00 of our $750.00 goal (you can still donate at www.marchforbabies.org/team/t1731408 if you would like to help us reach it or even better SURPASS our goal).  We took pictures and we spent time walking side by side and being grateful for two preamature babies who are running us ragged as toddlers.  And all of us couldn't be more delighted!

May your HealthFULL Journey swirl in with those precious memories that remind you where you've been and motivates you to healthier choices of your future journey FULL of Health.

'Til we meet again. . .

Let's Use our Feet

Let's use our feet is an expression a dear friend of mine would ask when she wanted to go for a walk.  On these walks we would share our daily lives, our dreams, our fears, and sometimes just the silence of walking with a friend.  They are some of my sweetest memories.  But why didn't she ask if I just wanted to go for a walk?  She had a very smart dog who L-O-V-E-D walks!  If we used the W word - the dog had to go.  This was a dog with short legs and couldn't walk as long as we used to enjoy.  Our penance would to be to walk with the dog around the block a couple of time or 1/2 mile and then we could go on our real "walk".  Then the dog caught the spelling version W-A-L-K also meant pure bliss and that is how the Let's Use Our Feet became our secret code :) 

Well I write this entry today because I want to use my feet.  There are two causes in April that are both very near and dear to my heart.  On April 14, 2012 I plan to walk a "FUN 5k" in support of Strides for Autism in honor of a sweet little princess named Madison :)  I have worked in the past with peoples of disabilities.  It is a career I miss very much as it was some of the most rewarding work (if you can call it that as there was much fun to be had and many memories that still make me smile) I've had the privilege to do.  Autism used to be diagnosed in extremely rare situations and has endured some horrible falsehoods.  One being that people diagnosed with autism were autistic due to refrigerator mom syndrome.  Basically that their mothers did not show them enough love.  What a horrible thing to believe and many people did for way too long of time.  Much research is being done (and needs to be done) because the prevalence is very real: 1 in 110 U.S. children with boys outnumbering the girls four to one.  (I don't have an article to support this fact as it is the most common stat I have read in at least ten articles/books within the last three years).  Good chances you know someone or a family that includes a person with autism.  I include family because this is a disability that doesn't change one person's life but all of those who support that person.  Communication, behavior, and health can all be altered due to autism.  This a disorder with a large umbrella of all those it affects and how it affects each individual.  There is not a one size fits all solution.  But as more research is done, more people can be helped, supported, and encouraged to live the best version of themselves.  If you would like to support this charity please donate funds at https://scautism.org/strides/team/3/ for Team Madison!

The other charity I plan to Use my Feet is for the March of Dimes when we will March for Babies April 28,2012.  I live in South Carolina and our statistic according to March of Dimes research is that one in seven babies are born premature.  There is a reason a pregnancy is meant to take forty weeks and what develops the most in the last couple months of pregnancy- lungs and brains.  Those are two very important organs; they help us breathe and they help us think.  I started writing this blog as a reaction to take my health more seriously when my niece Lilli was born at only 24 1/2 weeks at the weight of one pound six ounces and twelve inches long.  She could wear my brother's wedding band up to her shoulder!  She is doing amazing!  But thanks to research and support she is alive and can see.  She faced a very real risk of going blind, but because of research - doctors were diligent in their observations and knew what warning signs to watch.

Almost a year after our niece's birth, my husband and I received news that we were to be parents.  Our joy grew but I have to admit there was always a gray cloud hanging in the back of my thoughts. I feared my son being born prematurely.  I witnessed a miracle and the wonders God can do. But I also witnessed and felt the rides of a frightening roller coaster ride that involves a NICU stay.  When I hit my twenty-fifth week of pregnancy I rejoiced, but not for too long as my body started to show signs of distress a couple of weeks later.  I was put on bedrest and four days later was admitted to the hospital.  I was given steroids in hopes of speeding up my son's development.  Every night I prepared myself for the possibility of my son's birth physically (no food or liquid after midnight) and emtionally (prayers of the healthiest timing) and every morning I was wheeled to an ultra-sound where tests were ran on both my son and myself.  It was deemed on my ninth day in the hospital that the safest alternative for Drew and me was to deliver.  I was only at 29 weeks.  My son was born at three pounds and eleven ounces and seventeen 1/2 inches long.  That is just a tish longer than a legal size piece of paper and lighter than most roasts.  My son was placed in the NICU for forty-four days.  I am grateful for the research that has been done on prematurity, the staff who cared for and about our son, and the prayers that lifted up our entire family.  Not everyone has the success story that we experienced twice in our family.  Every family should have the moment of welcoming home their own miracle.  Please help me support the efforts of March of Dimes.  My team page is http://www.marchforbabies.org/team/t1731408 where you can see a couple of our miracles and donate to our family team : Early Bugs.  Or you can also donate online at www.marchforbabies.org/SuzySullivan . 

Your funds are most appreciated for either or both charities - that is why I am Using my Feet in hopes of raising money for these two organizations.  But there are other ways to show support; Prayers are always needed and appreciated, encouragement is nice, and advertising these web addresses through e-mail, facebook, twitter, or your own blog/website is beyond helpful :) 

Thank you for your time, your assistance, and your support.

May your HealthFULL Journey motivate you to use your whole self. 'Til we meet again. . .

Winners never quit and quitters never win!

Have you ever heard this expression before?

Winners never quit and quitters never win!

If we apply logical reasoning to this popular saying, one cannot be both a winner and a quitter. If I had to choose a team. I may have to be on the Quitters team. And if I am completely honest, maybe even captain of the Quitters team. However, I am working hard to be on the Winners team, even if it means only as a bench - warmer.

I never mean to quit. But then, it is hard to believe anyone starts a project, works toward a goal, commits themselves fully to an idea in hopes of not finishing. I even try to rationalize my reasons for dropping out, sometimes I even convince myself it is for heroic reasons. That by my stepping down I am allowing others the chance to win, lead, or at least finish. That by fading into the background I am choosing to be noble. Truthfully, it is easier to drop the ball early in the race then to get to crunch time and risk failing. Risk disappointing those who were counting on a flawless performance.

I wring my hand at the thought of disappointing others. There is only one other feeling that I hate to stir up in others even more than disappointment is knowing that I did something to cause someone else to become upset. I like people to feel calm, soothed, and downright comfortable around me. Which is why I believe I choose to avoid personal confrontation like the bubonic plague. Absolutely there are some fights worth fighting! Those fights may include helping others lead improved lives which I have stood toe to toe in some of those battles and happily would do so again. But when it comes to personal goals and battles I usually have chosen to sweep my half-hearted attempts under the rug. If I truly want to attain a firm grasp on living a HealthFULL life by traveling my HealthFULL Journey then I have to start finishing some races (regardless of if I place last or first) and most importantly see my actions completed. Not everything I have to offer will be perfect, but I will see my actions through from beginning to end.

As I close, let me share one of my first goals I plan to accomplish. I am raising five hundred dollars for the March of Dimes. This started as a charity my office chose to support. I felt it would be easier to rally behind by making it personal. I sent out letters and emails announcing my plans to participate in the March for Babies that took place in April 2009. I chose to March in honor of five wonderful women that I am privileged to call friends who were pregnant at that time (months later the world has welcomed four beautiful girls and one handsome boy). I also Marched in memory of a little boy that left us far too soon at the age of fifteen months, but left a profound footprint upon many hearts, especially mine. As the March neared, I was super nervous if I would be able to complete the fully anticipated six miles (they ended up shortening the length to four miles, whew!). I did finish the March for Babies and was pleased that I raised $350 of my anticipated $500. That is seventy percent! I felt pleased at my respectable effort.

Well one hundred days ago my family was greeted with an amazing miracle, my youngest niece. As of October 1st, 2009, she is still a week away from her original due date of October 8th, 2009. That's right! Our family's smallest miracle entered the world according to her schedule. Because of some of the March of Dimes funded research my family is directly benefiting from their passionate research and outreaching efforts. Because of organizations like March of Dimes my precious niece can experience the best of care even while starting off with such a fragile beginning. In honor of her I feel I need to see this goal to the full $500. I would love to be an aunt that can show all my nieces and nephews that we don't have to finish first but we should always complete the race. I am currently 82% of my goal at $410. Perhaps there are nine people who can donate ten dollars to this worthwhile cause and help me both honor one of my "newest" heroes while also motivating me further along my own HealthFULL Journey.

If you would like to help complete the goal of $500 in honor of my family's littlest miracle, please go to www.marchforbabies.org/SuzySullivan . Also if you have any comments, questions, or topic suggestions and would rather not share them publicly you can email me at HealthFULLjourney@gmail.com .

Thank you for meeting me here on my HealthFULL Journey. 'Til we meet again. . .

I have fought the good fight. I have finished the race.

I have kept the faith. -- 2 Timothy 4:7