Day 2 and not as gung ho as Day 1!

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The weather was shining and another perfect day for a walk but I ignored the beauty as my stomach churned off the craving temptations. Do you have a vice? To not be outdone I have maybe a gazillion, but when you "NEED" so many items it is no longer a vice or even the delightful treat it is a tornado of bad news. I have a pretty good imagination and with a simple wiggle of a thought it can grip my entire body, salivating my tongue, filling my head with such enticing images that advertisers would hire me in an instant if they could see, a stomach churning and only the item of desire can stop it. Everything and anything else will taste like sawdust in comparison. I had two gripping my taste buds. Let's say a fish fella from Dickey M's and a Big Caramel Frappoo from Barstucks. I know some people would say, really? Who could crave that. I do , a lot! The Barstucks pick me up has became a Friday tradition for me. My way of patting myself on the back for ....completing the week? It's the adult version of chocolate milk after school/work in my opinion. I convince myself that I just "need" that little pick me up to have that extra burst of energy to get so much accomplished. But let's be honest. One I don't really savor the flavor because I am so thirsty and down it before my tastebuds are even awake. And two, a small black coffee is going to give me a bigger boost than the fatty cream and sweet sugar. But I am so good in my imagination that I trounce logic with my beauty shots of that icy foamy goodness. And why go small when for a dollar I can double the size. Bargain shopping and satisfying a craving - winner!!! And Dickey M's is another childhood memory. The salty, greasy bites with a little sweetness has filled my belly quite numerous times. But I don't stop at one sandwich...Oh no! I am a girl who likes variety, so I grab a burger (with cheese, because otherwise what's the point?), and my chicken buddies because than I can dip in sauce (I love sauce combos). And again then the bargain shopping is it cheaper to add a drink and fries, by making it a combo? No because you're spending more. But fries can easily be sneaked while driving and when they're hot and obviously I'm hungry I have ordered almost three meals. And then the drink is free so that is a waste even though I really want to Barstucks because they're beverage is so much more satisfying when the craving monster is lurking on the tongue and partying in the tummy. Writing this I am trying to keep a sense of humor. But yes I have ordered three sandwiches and ate them at one sitting while washing them down with a big soda. (Quite a bit at my heaviest, at least the stops have became almost rare). I also have stopped at two fast food chains for one meal for just myself. But here is the real downer. I have myself so hyped up to fulfill this craving than I bite into these yummy heavenly "snacks" and 99% of the time. The bite never meets the expectation. The food is cold, the tartar sauce is not a dollop but a sea of sauce overtaking the sandwich, the bun is stale, heaven forbid the sauce was forgotten or the order incomplete (isn't that awful!) and on and on. Now there is that one percent chance that the food really hits that perfect spot which builds credibility for the cravings. It's rare, it's like playing the lottery, you know the odds are horrible but yet there is that magic illusion that perfection could be reached and so you owe it to yourself to at least try. But here is the food victory...I didn't stop at either place. My craving went unaswered and here's the clincher, I survived. It turns out I really didn't NEED the fish fella nor the Big Caramel Frappoo, it turns out I just wanted them and I don't really know why. And for exercise of fifteen minutes. It took two hours to muster the energy and motivation to walk/dance around my house for fifteen minutes with my son (cardio and strength training - such a multi-tasker :) while watching tv. I didn't work up a downpour of sweat but I did increase my heart rate and it was an improvement over lounging in the recliner feeling guilty that I don't have enough time in my day to excercise/move for fifteen minutes (Notice I wrote that it took two hours to achieve motivation. Don't get me wrong I wasn't lounging those two full hours as I was getting household tasks done too.)It really is finding that push to move forward and step up my game. Fully Understand Life by Living isn't about always being super-excited to achieve maximum performance. Sometimes pushing through the mucky murky feelings is as good as it gets. But enough drags through the muck will reach that end result of treasured happiness, even if it is just the joy of being out of the muck. May the HealthFULL Journey have more joyful accomplishments but the satisfaction that sometimes getting through the muck is even more rewarding. 'Til we meet again. . .